Thursday, August 25, 2016

Bachelor in Paradise 3x06 & 3x07 Roundtables: It All Falls Down [Contributors: Patti, Alisa, Rae, Rebecca]

It's getting real on Bachelor in Paradise, which pretty much means everything is falling apart. Rock-solid couple Vinny and Izzy are kaputs, and cracks are starting to show in Lace and Grant's relationship. But the biggest mess of all is Ashley I., Caila, and Jared's woeful love triangle. See what Alisa, Rae, Rebecca, and special guest Patti Murin had to say about this week's episodes.

Literally what is going on with Caila and Ashley I.?

Patti: Neither are amazing in my book, but Caila ekes out a win because she at least seems slightly more rational than Ashley I. Also, I love the fact that we are still calling her “Ashley I.” even when she’s the only Ashley. Does anyone remember the other Ashley?

I feel for Ashley because she is heartbroken, but when she starts to talk crap about Caila and (seemingly, editing could be in play here) sabotages her intentions, it makes me prickle. That’s just being a mean girl. The whole “Caila deciding whether or not to go on a date with Brett” thing was hilarious and ridiculously difficult, but at least her heart is in the right place and she’s obviously taking this whole thing seriously. Ashley I. is just there to ruin people’s lives for her own gain.

Alisa: I’m pretty convinced that Ashley I. has been tasked with being the female villain of the show and is loving every minute of that role. I have to cling to that because otherwise she’s just a seriously disturbed woman who shouldn’t be allowed to interact with people, and should have gone the way of The Chad a long time ago.

I like Caila; she seems like a sweetheart. Granted, watching her take indecisiveness to the extreme and then declare “emotions are hard” was pretty irritating, but I have to give her props for being honest about her feelings, owning the right to explore her options, and not falling madly in love with Jared after two seconds in Paradise. She comes across as a genuinely sincere and kind person, and is honestly way too good for Jared.

Jared and Ashley’s relationship is seriously unhealthy and if he’s not going to date Ashley, then he really needs to cut all ties with her because he is just feeding into her psychosis and enabling her awful behavior. Plus, he’s ruining his relationship with Caila who, let’s be honest, is the best thing that ever happened to him.

Rae: Ashley I. is definitely not treating anybody right here, including herself, and I am not that enthused about continuing to watch her spiral. But I have been in Ashley I.’s shoes — only turned down about 20 notches — and I really feel like a lot of the blame falls on Jared, the biggest dummy of them all. (Seriously, who turns around and tells the person they are trying to woo all the bad stuff someone said about them?!)

I am sure he loves having a hot young virgin follow him around tell him how special he is, and how hot he is, and that she’s willing to make out with him at any second. He does not at all seem to be in a rush to tell Ashley I. to mind her own business and lay off Caila. He is being the worst and couching it in the appearance of a nice guy who wants to be friends with people. But you can’t be friends with someone who is in love with you. It takes two people to be friends, and it takes only one to turn a relationship into an emotional black hole of despair. You have to cut Ashley I. loose, Jared. Stop worrying about looking so nice and be kind to her instead.

Ashley is losing her mind, I can’t deny that. But the things she is saying about Caila — that she wants a happy ending more than a real relationship — is exactly the vibe I got from Caila on Ben’s season. I’m sorry! I know she seems sweet, especially compared to Ashley. But everything Caila says seems like she’s talking about a fairytale in her head instead of reality. She’s just so, I don’t know, eager? Like a little bambi? Or something?

Rebecca: I think Ashley I. is absolutely delusional, but part of that is because Jared just keeps leading her on, which is so frustrating to watch! She’s obsessed with him, there’s no other way to put it, and to us, he’s CLEARLY not interested... yet, it’s not clear to Ashley I. This episode was the first time he’s told her directly he’s not interested, and he needs to follow through with that. I agree with what’s been said — he needs to completely cut her off. Don’t talk to her, don’t hang out with her, don’t enable her. She’s going to be stuck in this fantasy until he completely cuts her off.

As far as Caila, I do like her. I liked her on The Bachelor and I like her now. She seems so kind and warm and genuine, and although I found her indecisiveness annoying, it’s real and it’s honest. (I’m sure my frustration stemmed from the show’s editing.) Ashley I. is so mean to her for no reason. I get that Ashley I. is jealous (I’ve been there), but tearing down the love of your life’s girlfriend is no way to “win him back” or whatever she thinks she’s doing. I hope things work out for Caila.

What do you think of Vinny’s departure?

Patti: SO SAD, but the most mature thing I’ve ever seen occur in Paradise. He was hurt and needed to remove himself from the narrative. Also, excellent play to be the next Bachelor.

Alisa: Totally agree with Patti. Incredibly mature on his part — and we all know what a rare occurrence maturity is on this show. Izzy did him wrong and instead of staying around to milk that 15 minutes of fame, or moping, or sabotaging any possible relationship between Izzy and Brett, he just left. Good on him for that. I hope he finds an amazing girl out here in the real world.

Rae: Who knew Vinny would turn out to be the best guy on the show! He was great and handled this in a way that makes him seem like a human person with feelings who tries to treat people with respect. I admire that he left because it was the best thing for him, rather than sticking around trying to stir up drama or date someone he knew he wouldn’t be interested in. I hope good things come his way.

Rebecca: I agree with everything that’s been said. I’ve mentioned before that I had no clue who he was on The Bachelorette, but I’ll never forget him now. I commend Izzy for being open about her feelings, but to give up on someone you have a connection with for a “lust at first sight” type of thing seems really unfair and cruel, and I feel so terrible for Vinny. I think Vinny made a really smart move, and I wish him the best of luck finding someone. He truly, truly deserves it.

Which couples are you loving? ... And hating?

Patti: Woof. None of them? Amanda and Josh — Josh is a toolface. Grant and Lace — we already know she’s gonna screw with him. Evan and Carly — I guess they’re cute and stuff, but I just can’t subscribe to it. Nick and Jen — NOPE. Who is Jen?!? Really afraid that no one else new is coming (except Wells, as we know from previews), and this is what we’ve got. Oh wait, Brett and Carl. WHO????

Alisa: Talk about scraping the bottom of the barrel with these contestants. I remember the days when the Bachelor Pad/Bachelor In Paradise season was made up of the “most beloved” and the “most controversial” contestants “EVER” and it created some pretty good television. But between Jen, Brett, Carl, Izzy, and was it Brandon (???), the only entertainment this season is trying to figure out if these people were ever actually Bachelor contestants or if they’re just randos the Bachelor Interns pulled off the street.

So, I can’t say I’m really loving any of the couples because it’s hard to be invested in someone when you can’t even remember their existence from week to week. Also, Evan is gross, Josh is scary, and Jared is stupid, so I can’t get behind them being allowed to date anyone.

Rebecca: Once again, these ladies are taking the words right out of my mouth. I do have to admit though: I LOVE Carl and...which twin was it? I can’t remember. I want to say Emily, but I’m not sure. But let’s go with Emily. Anyway, Carl is hot, Emily is hot, and I think they look great together. They seem to me like that couple who are the life of the party, the one everyone likes to be around and are friends with everyone but they aren’t really that serious and won’t last very long. I doubt they’ll make it out of Paradise, but I’m going to enjoy looking at them until them.

The only other couples I can even tolerate are Jared/Caila and Evan/Carly because I like the ladies so much. Who else is rooting for Caila and Carly to get together?

Rae: Rebecca, I love the twins! (What I don’t love is the show’s treatment of the twins.) I think they are smart and funny, and I would want to be friends with them. It weirds me out when guys in their mid-30s go after someone in their early 20s, but you’re right — they seem to be on the same wavelength. Other that, I sort of hate everyone. I could get behind Jared and Caila maybe, but I dislike Evan so much I can’t stand to watch him with Carly.

Carly, if you don’t know if you like someone, that means you don’t like them!

What did you all think of this week's episode? Sound off in the comments below!


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