“Bad Beat”
Original Airdate: November 7, 2017
On the latest Brooklyn Nine-Nine episode, Jake and Terry team up to take down Dan “Daniel” Valdano. Yes, his nickname really is longer than is regular name. Valdano is an illegal arms dealer who will be at an illegal gambling club later in the week. Jake and Terry want to go undercover as expert poker players (which they are not), lose a gold watch to Valdano (which is bugged), and then they can track his every move. Holt is concerned their poker skills aren’t up to the task so volunteers to go with him. He, being a math genius, is also an amazing poker player. There’s only one slight problem: Holt has a bit of gambling addiction (he once lost $20K on a horse named Yabba Dabba Do, who stumbled in the final stretch). Despite Terry’s concerns, Holt and Jake reach a compromise.
Similarly high stakes shenanigans are happening back in the precinct. Hitchcock and Scully are busy organizing stacks and stacks of paperwork and Rosa’s been assigned to help. They bet her that she can’t last a full day of sitting in her chair — something they are pros at. Though she thinks they’re idiots and extremely lazy, she agrees to the bet and the “Butt-lympics” commence.
Meanwhile, Boyle’s having a great day. First, Jake popped the question and Boyle is officially best man at Jake and Amy’s wedding. Then, he found a food truck for super cheap on the police auction website and bought it. Amy’s the one and only investor in Boyle’s food truck dreams, and she’s more than a little horrified that Boyle bought a food truck that is known around the precinct as the “murder truck.” It came into police possession after it was discovered the taco truck was being used to smuggle heroin and several members of the cartel were dismembered inside the truck. But Boyle doesn’t care if a knee was found in the deep-fryer; he’s just elated it was such a bargain.
Over at the poker game, Jake has gone in undercover as a guy who lives in his mom’s basement but plays a lot of online poker, while Holt talks him through the game over an earpiece Jake’s hiding under his hoodie. This isn’t the illegal game that Valdano will be at, it’s just an opportunity for Jake to show off “his” skills and get an invitation to underground game. Terry’s still nervous that this will trigger Holt’s gambling addiction but Holt insists he’s fine. Unfortunately, Holt makes a bad call. He tells Jake to go all in on the first hand. Jake loses all his money and has to make an awkward exit.
They meet up in the men’s bathroom to discuss what went wrong, but Holt is confident he can pull them through this and hands over a huge stack of his own money so Jake can reenter the game. This time, Jake wins big and scores an invite to the underground club.
Back at the Butt-lympics, Rosa’s held out for 9 hours and 55 minutes of just sitting and can barely handle it. Hitchcock and Scully aren’t impressed. This is child’s play for them. Even though she lasted the whole shift, Hitchcock and Scully are taking the game into overtime.
Meanwhile, Amy attempts a heart-to-heart with Boyle over the murder truck. Unfortunately, her concerns fall on deaf ears. In fact, Boyle so completely misinterpreted their conversation earlier that he has named it Murder Truck, their menu is printed with a crime scene photo background, and the food options are equally gory. She’s convinced they’re going to lose their hard-earned investment money but Boyle thinks it’ll be a big hit. He’s invites her to come look at all his hard work in getting the truck ready but when they head out to the parking lot, they discover the truck has been completely ransacked. To make matters worse, Boyle’s insurance coverage on the truck doesn’t start until tomorrow.
The next morning, Terry and Jake are chatting about how impressed they are that Holt didn’t fall back into his addiction when they hear him shouting from his office. He has three monitors set up and is playing multiple online poker games at once while also watching a child’s beauty pageant (he has $8k riding on one of the contestants). Jake tells Terry their only option is to cut the internet connection to Holt’s office, but this only drives Holt to the roof, trying to get a signal with his phone. Terry and Jake stage an intervention, during which Holt fires them, claims he doesn’t have a problem, and then tries to head to an internet café. It takes threatening to call his husband before Holt finally admits he has a problem and vows to stop cold turkey.
Over at the Butt-lympics, Rosa, Hitchcock, and Scully are going on 32 hours of sitting when they decide to head on out (in their rolling chairs) down the street for hotdogs. While they sit in their chairs in the street eating their hotdogs, Scully’s napkin gets blown away. Hitchcock instinctually jumps up to grab it for him, thereby losing the Butt-lympics. In a show of solidarity, Rosa and Scully decide to stand as well and end the games.
Back inside, Amy has great news for Boyle. She’s discovered who destroyed their truck: the cartel. Apparently there was still heroin stashed behind the fridge and an enforcer came to get it. They have his DNA, traces of the heroin, and the truck’s been impounded which means they get their investment money back. Boyle isn’t happy about this news, though. He feels like Amy never believed in his dreams, which are rotting just like the 50 pounds of meat he bought. Amy gives Boyle a pep talk and agrees to invest in another food truck with him, as long as it’s not a murder truck this time. She reminds him that he’s an incredible chef and needs to follow this dream of his the whole way through.
It seems Jake and Terry aren’t having that same success with Holt. Jake’s infiltrated the underground gambling club, with Terry directing him via the earcomm, when all of a sudden they spot Holt at a nearby table. He lied straight to their faces and is in deep. They pull him into the bathroom for another intervention, but he isn’t having it. He tells them he’s off-duty and can do what he wants on his own time. After expressing their disappointment, they head back out to gamble against Valdano. Unfortunately for Holt, Valdano’s bodyguard was in a stall and heard the whole thing. He comes out with his gun pointed at Holt’s head.
Back at the table, Jake doesn’t get the chance to play because Valdano gets called away “on business.” His bodyguard has Holt stashed in Valdano’s limo and they decide to take a little ride together. When Jake and Terry call Holt’s phone wondering where he is, Valdano has him answer and pretend everything’s fine. Holt says he’s on his way to Atlantic City for some more gambling.
Fortunately, Jake can tell Holt’s lying because he used a double contraction, and they race to intercept the limo. They save Holt and arrest Valdano. Holt vows to quit gambling for real this time. He asks Terry and Jake to take him to a Gambler’s Anonymous meeting and they agree.
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