Wednesday, May 25, 2016

The Bachelorette 12x01 Roundtable: Bring on the Men [Contributors: Chelsea, Alisa Williams, Rae Nudson]

Welcome, welcome, welcome to our Bachelorette roundtables. After every episode this season, Chelsea, Alisa, and Rae will breakdown what happens on JoJo’s journey to find her one true love. So far the men have made their introductions, and Jojo met a few guys that made a great first impression. And, of course, she met some that definitely did not.

Who do you think did the best introduction or had the best gimmick? What about the worst?

Chelsea: So I before the episode, my friends and I printed off and filled out two brackets — one for the entire season, one for week-to-week viewing. I had done my research going into the premiere and was happy to see that most of my initial reactions to the guys were spot-on. Wells is already a favorite of mine and his gimmick worked. It was just cheesy enough to capture my heart and hopefully JoJo’s. Luke also had a very sweet gimmick going for him.

For the worst, it was easily Sal. Nobody wants to hold your balls. Also, Chad is a sociopath.

Alisa: I have to agree with Chelsea. Wells is adorable, and who wouldn’t choose a guy who brought an acapella group with him? And even though Luke looks like a super villain, riding in on a unicorn was a super cute nod to the terrifying unicorn head JoJo donned to meet Ben. And, being one of those people who’s obsessed with all things Christmas, I have to say I actually adored Nick B. dressing up as Santa and passing out stuffed animals. Though I think staying in the Santa costume the entire night and getting all sweaty and gross was a bit much. But A for effort!

As for the worst, I am not a fan of any guy who references his junk when first meeting a girl. So, I was glad that Jonathan and Sal didn’t make it through the first night. Later, boys. Try again when you grow up a bit.

Rae: I loved the entrance on a unicorn for JoJo since it was a callback to her entrance on the show, and it showed Luke paid attention. It was playful. I also liked that he actually works with horses, so it felt less gimmicky and more like showing JoJo a part of his life. I did not like Santa, mostly because it was very difficult to see his face, and I think that would make it a lot harder to connect with him. Also, he got real sweaty. I didn’t get the guys hating on Jonathan because of his kilt — he’s actually Scottish! Kilts are a thing that people actually wear! — but he definitely should have been hated on for telling a complete stranger he wasn’t wearing panties. I think JoJo is a very generous person in that she always kind to the guy, no matter how weird his entrance was.

Chad is 100% the absolute worst. I don’t know what came out when he was talking with JoJo (other than the weird hint about how he has money now?), but I hope he reveals his true colors soon, and it looks like he will. Toxic masculinity hurts everyone, and Chad is its poster boy.

I know some people would eat it up, but a date introducing himself by singing me a song on his guitar is like the worst thing I can think of for myself. Sorry, James Taylor. Also hilarious that the show went with his entire last name when they usually skip last names or just use an initial.

Okay, Hipster Brandon, you do not get any cool points for not knowing anything about the Bachelorette. You are on the show.

Who would you give your first impression rose to?

Chelsea: I am so okay with Jordan getting the first impression rose. He’s already in my top four for the season. Personally, I would have went with Wells or Luke, but Jordan is adorable and that kiss was perfect.

Alisa: I would have given the first impression rose to Jordan’s hair for defying the laws of nature and all things holy. But if I have to choose an actual person to give the rose to, then it would be Christian. He seems like a genuinely good guy. I don’t know how much of that came out in his conversations with JoJo that first night but I hope he sticks around for a while so she can see his amazingness!

Rae: I also like Jordan! I think he is potentially a good match for JoJo, especially since her life after the show will be dabbling in celebrity, and he’s been dabbling in celebrity for a while now. Plus, they could go on double dates with Aaron Rodgers and Olivia Munn. I give him points for not dropping that he’s Aaron Rodgers’ brother on the first night.

But I think if I were picking, I would give my first impression rose to Luke. He seems like he really has his it together and feels sure of himself. On his bio, he lists his three best attributes as “competence, patience, empathy for others,” and those are honestly the sexiest qualities I can think of, though I know I am lacking in them myself.

If you had to call it right now, who are the four men going to hometowns? Let’s check in on our predictions later in the season.

Chelsea: On my entire season bracket, I have Wells, Jordan, Derek, and Chase for hometowns but now I’d swap Chase for Luke now. I’m pretty comfortable with those picks right now. You know ABC isn’t going to miss a chance to have Jordan’s famous brother on the show if they can but also, Jordan is just so cute and sweet. They’re both coming from a place of heartbreak and I could see it working out well. All those boys are cuties though.

Alisa: With the disclaimer that my predictions tend to be totally wrong, I’m going to go with Nick B. (a.k.a Santa!), Christian, Jordan, and Wells. Personally, I’m not a fan of Jordan and I feel like ABC is already setting him up to be the next Bachelor, but the other three men seem like good guys so far and I’d like to see them stick around. Especially Christian — I mean, we got that glimpse of him roughhousing with his younger brothers and we know they live with him. I want to hear more of that story.

Rae: I agree, Alisa, I think Christian seemed great in his promo. I hope more of his personality comes out to Jojo (and us!) soon. And that is a great point about ABC grooming him to be the next Bachelor. I think I’ll go with Jordan, Luke, Wells, and... I’m not sure. I’ll go with Christian.

What do you think of the introductions? Let us know in the comments! 


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