Thursday, June 9, 2016

The Bachelorette 12x03 & 12x04 Roundtable: Dancing, Diving, and Danger [Contributors: Alisa Williams, Rae Nudson, Chelsea]

In a two-part Bachelorette event this week, Chad finally got eliminated, but somehow he's still on the show. Rae, Alisa, and Chelsea call shenanigans and delve into the drama and dates of this week's Bachelorette episodes.

Hoo boy, what do you think is going on with Chad?

Rae: I think it is really outrageous that the producers allowed him to go back to the house. Like, at what point are they liable for keeping a potentially violent, volatile person around? I’ve seen UnReal, so I know things get shady and gross behind the scenes, but this is making me feel viscerally uncomfortable and bad. The producers probably gave Chad a ride back to the house! Between this and having Ben Roethlisberger on the show, who has been accused of sexual assault multiple times, I guess The Bachelorette has made its view on violent behavior pretty clear.

I’m choosing to believe the producers forced JoJo to keep Chad around until the two-on-one. But I also get that she felt guilty and sad about his mom and wanted to give him some space to deal with his ish — I wish she didn’t, but I get where that is coming from. But I was so grateful to finally hear her say that threatening and acting aggressive is unacceptable to her and he had to go. Maybe she didn’t know everything he did before, but she knows who he is now.

Why does Chad want to shut people up in the first place? And how is hitting them even an option, much less the only option?

But that’s not even the scariest thing he said. The scariest part was when he was saying that he believed JoJo was into him, no matter what she said. That he could see it in the way she looked at him. In other words: her words said no, but her body said yes. That is the scariest part by far.

Alisa: Chad is clearly unstable. I don’t think anyone’s doubting that at this point. And he DEFINITELY should have been either left in the woods to forage for protein shakes and think about his poor life choices, or escorted to one of the SUVs and driven straight to the airport. Allowing him to make a beeline back to the hotel and confront the other guys may make for great television, but as Rae said, it also opens up the show to a handful of liability issues. You can’t just go around threatening people with bodily harm, even on “reality” TV. Get it together, Bachelorette producers! Chad needs to go, and he need to go right now. This should not have been allowed to continue for as long as it has.

Chelsea: Chad was totally kept around by the producers to be a villain and they played him up too much this season. There were a lot of odd edits with him and I would not be surprised if they told him to scare the other contestants because he just repeats the same thing over and over again. I mean, he clearly has some anger issues and is a toxic alpha male but also this show is as manipulative as they come. They made you think that Evan was bleeding because of Chad, and that didn’t actually happen. These guys are just messes.

I do have a simple question for Chad. How can you be a “Luxury Real Estate Agent” in Tulsa, Oklahoma? I’ve been to Tulsa and could not find you anything “luxurious.” Stop trying so hard to be better than everyone. You are human garbage.

Follow up question: why are you eating a whole sweet potato raw?

What do you think of the eliminations this week?

Alisa: I was really bummed to see both Christian and Nick (a.k.a. Santa Clause) get the boot. I was rooting for both of them! Christian just seems like the most amazing guy. He’s respectful, successful, and is taking care of his younger brothers. What more could you want? And Nick just seems really funny and sweet. Both of them were clearly lightyears more mature than Chad. I really don’t know what JoJo was thinking keeping Chad around over these two awesome men.

Rae: Same, Alisa. Like I said before, I’m choosing to believe the producers had a hand in keeping Chad around because I can’t face that she let sort of normal-seeming guys go (Christian! Nick! Ali!) and kept around Chad and Vinny? Like, there’s no way Vinny is going to make it to the fantasy suites, right? I also forget Robby exists every time he leaves the screen, so I hope he doesn’t last much longer.

Chelsea: I was super sad to see Christian, Nick, and Ali go but also they seem like decent human beings; and the ones that won’t give into the producers won’t stay. Also, they will only keep the older contestant and contestants of color around for so long to appease the people. The UnReal contestant said the contestants of color get eliminated by episode three, and there we go.

As delighted as I am that Chad was eliminated, I also really wanted Alex to go home as well. He’s very immature and gives into Chad’s taunting. But even worse is that he instigates it a lot when Chad isn’t doing anything. I need him and Evan to go very soon.

How do you think JoJo is doing, and how are you feeling about her so far?

Alisa: Well, I’ve been pretty open about the fact that I’m not a fan of JoJo, and wasn’t thrilled when she was named this season’s Bachelorette. On Ben’s season, she just didn’t come across as someone who was mature enough for a serious relationship or would know how to distinguish the good guys from the bad ones. And I have to say, so far she’s only confirming my opinions. She seems really stuck on how physically attractive these men are. And don’t get me wrong — it’s important to be attracted to your partner! But, on the list of things that makes for a good relationship, big muscles and a chiseled jaw line shouldn’t really break the top 10. And yet, that seems to be all JoJo can talk about. Look, of course these guys are unreasonably attractive. It’s television! No one would watch otherwise. But I just really wish JoJo would get past their looks and focus on their minds and hearts and how they treat her. I think if she did, Chad would have been gone after week two, and maybe Christian and Nick would still be around.

Rae: I love JoJo. She is very generous with these men and does a great job of making them feel appreciated and cared about. She somehow made a pool party with 17 of your boyfriends look really fun when I know in my heart it would be a nightmare. I am also amazed at the way she handled Evan. She had him thinking he was the most special person on earth and like it was his idea to be generous and keep Chad around, when really JoJo just got everything she wanted.

I sort of love that JoJo doesn’t give a what and is making out with everyone. Get some, girl.

Chelsea: I love JoJo and think she’s having a great time dating all these guys and figuring out what she wants in a partner. I think people are giving her crap because she’s kissing all the guys and isn’t afraid to be attracted to them, but Ben did the same exact thing and no slut-shaming. She’s been really great trying to diffuse the drama in the house and be fair to all parties and I really appreciate that about her. When she came to conclusions and shut down Chad when he was being rude and disrespectful, she was strong and didn’t let him talk over her.

What do you think was good and bad about the dates this week?

Alisa: The dates were just blah to me. We’ve done it all before. I know after the approximately 82 seasons of the Bachelor/Bachelorette franchise, it’s probably near impossible to come up with new and exciting dates. But the random concerts with country singers no one’s heard of and the comedy shows where the men are forced to awkwardly participate are getting stale. And oh wow — a hot yoga date AND a hot tub date? Did NOT see that coming!

I did enjoy the swing dancing lessons and retro flash mob with James Taylor. He’s a fluffy puppy masquerading as a human man and I ship him for it. He handled the whole date well (I would have died of embarrassment trying to dance, surrounded by all those people), and JoJo looked amazing. I need that navy polka dot dress in my life.

Rae: Um, sexy yoga? It did not seem sexy at all. Didn’t Chris have the exact same date? And there is definitely no way Luke knew who that band was. These dates go hard for gender stereotypes, but wouldn't it be more interesting the the boys played a sport they had never tried before? Curling, maybe. 

The comedy date sounds horrifying to participate in but pretty fun to watch for JoJo. Plus it gives a good indication of who can laugh at themselves. Chad's delivery was, of course, a disaster, but Grant's story had me laughing out loud.

Chelsea: Okay, those weren’t even real yoga instructors. They totally dragged those people off the street and offered them money to teach “yoga,” and those people just made it up as they went (I, too, would do the same). How long was she just sitting on him and staring? The instructors weren’t even there at that point. They hopped out of there real quick with their money. What a way to get pretty people in suggestive situations.

Now James Taylor's date was so dang cute. Look at how great JoJo looked, too. 

I don’t think James Taylor is going to win but he has won the hearts of all of us girls in my watch party. She really needed that date too and he was the perfect person for it. He’s such a bundle of sunshine and positivity. Too sweet and pure for this show. And so tall and adorable. Him opening up to JoJo about his insecurities growing up felt like the most real moment this season. Can he be the next Bachelor? He’s so much fun and would be 10000000% better to watch than boring Ben.

What did you think of the double-dose of The Bachelorette this week? Sound off in the comments below!


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