Thursday, September 14, 2017

Bachelor in Paradise Was a Hot Mess This Season, And Here’s Why [Contributors: Rebecca, Alisa, and Chelsea]


Well, Bachelor in Paradise has ended and our ladies aren't exactly thrilled with the disappointing antics they were forced to endure this season. Hear what they have to say about the new Bachelor and more!

Before we go to Paradise, we have to talk about our new Bachelor. How surprised were you to see Arie announced? Who were your top three picks for our next leading man? Is the franchise in trouble going back five years? 


Rebecca: They’re definitely in trouble. No one knows who Arie is — even people like me who have been watching the show for YEARS. Literally the only things I remembered about him were his pretty eyes and that he drives a race car. Not very memorable. My top three picks would have been Ben Z, Wells, and Eric.

Alisa: Well, Rebecca remembered wayyy more about Arie than I did. I watched Emily’s season too but have absolutely no recollection of Arie except that the name sounded vaguely familiar. I think it definitely says something about the franchise if they’re having to go back five years to find someone. I mean, come on. Ben Z has been my absolute top choice for Bachelor ever since he was a contestant. He can talk to me about his dog all day long and into the night and that would be fine with me! I also really liked Diggy, Will, and Fred from Rachel’s season. Going back a little further, I mean, they could have at least tried to convince Luke to do it after he was ROBBED last season by the hot mess that is Nick. Point being, there are PLENTY of great picks that people would actually remember and if they ALL turned producers down, well, that says something about the show and its future.

Chelsea: This is so disappointing of a pick. So many of us don’t even remember him or we can’t even go back to watch his season. We could have had a Wells, Ben Z., or Peter but nope. I think there is a huge disparity in what Mike Fleiss the creator wants and what the other producers want on the show. I didn’t think it could get worse than Nick’s season but here we are.

So much has happened in the past two weeks in Mexico for the cast. The only solid couple at this point seems to be Derek and Taylor. What do you make of this little fairytale? 


Rebecca: Derek and Taylor are sooooooooooo boring. I could break my keyboard with how many more o’s I want to add on. I have no doubt they’ll get engaged, but I don’t see them lasting long-term. Taylor still strikes me as immature, stirring up drama for the fun of it. I literally always forget about them until they come on screen. I wish we had seen more of Diggy/Dom and Adam/Raven instead.

Alisa: Ugh. Derek and Taylor are the worst. I’m still mad about their whole “fight” a couple weeks back. Like, I don’t think anyone on Twitter heard what she said to him that elicited the “F you.” She flat-up said to him that he has a ton of qualities she doesn’t want in a relationship partner. People acted like he just casually swore at her out of nowhere, but umm... how do you just casually tell someone they’re not right for you but you’re with them anyway, and then expect them to not have an angry reaction? Not saying swearing at your partner is the appropriate response, but what Taylor said wasn’t appropriate either. All of this is to say, they seem like the type of couple who’s gonna smile and front for the audience but when the cameras are off (or they think they’re off), that’s when the real Taylor and Derek come out and it’s not pretty and it’s not perfect. Taylor is super immature and Derek is, I don’t even know, not interesting enough to psychoanalyze. And yeah, I don’t see them working out long term. But I’m sure their mutually amicable break-up announcement that literally no one will care to read will be just as perfect as they appear.

Chelsea: These two are just an exhausting couple to watch and I’m just waiting for them to break up. They might like each other in Paradise but I’m curious to see how they’ll function in the real world. I find Taylor to be overly critical and annoying, and Derek just wants his franchise love story. I mean heck, he broke up with another franchise alum before going on the show. Let the countdown to the end begin.

The Kristina/Dean/DLo saga was faced head-on. How did you feel about the conclusion?


Rebecca: Wow, I have a lot of feelings about this. I feel horrible for Kristina. To not only have someone you were falling in love with admit to you that they loved you before going after some other girl ONLY because she’s really hot, but then to have your best friend take the other girl’s side has to be such a painful experience. I get what Raven is saying — that Kristina should be more angry at Dean than DLo — but DLo does have some fault here. She knew Dean and Kristina were pretty serious and just didn’t care. I get that in life, you need to go after what you want, but stealing another person’s man right in front of them is a different level of disrespect. As Kristina’s friend, Raven just needed to shut up and listen and offer support, even if she didn’t agree with Kristina.

But the worst of the lot is Dean. I’ve lost so much respect for Dean throughout this whole situation. He’s shallow, immature, and childish, and letting Kristina go is a mistake that will haunt him for the rest of his life. I hope he has fun banging DLo while he can, because that relationship has zero depth and will not last. Kristina is way too good for him and too good for The Bachelor franchise in general.

Alisa: I don’t think I can add anything to this that hasn’t already been said on Twitter by #BachelorNation. But I’ll reiterate some of the wise words that were flowing that night. Dean is disgusting and I think what struck so deep with that situation is that SO MANY girls have been in a similar situation: where there’s a guy you’re so in love with who says you’re perfect for him in so many ways but... then he proceeds to tell you why he just wants to be with someone else who he KNOWS isn’t right for him but he just needs his “freedom” or he’s just “not ready” or he’s just “not good enough” for you but you really are perfect and you really are his always (just not his right now). And that level of manipulative crap is what keeps girls hanging on to guys that absolutely DO NOT deserve them. It’s disgusting, Dean’s disgusting, and he’s no better than pretty much every guy I ever met in high school and college. Good luck to him and DLo. They deserve each other.

And as for Raven... look. I’ll say what I said on Twitter that night: “Truthful friends are important. But learning when a friend just needs you to be silent and listen? Even better.” Having someone hurtle truth at you when you’re in pain and feel broken is NOT helpful. There’s a proper time, place, and tone for truth. I hope Raven and Kristina’s friendship is strong enough to get through Raven’s density and the added pain she caused that night. And I hope Raven learns and grows and becomes a better friend after it. But if not? Then Kristina has EVERY RIGHT to cut Raven loose just like she did Dean. Because friends who are just going to kick you when you’re down (whether intentionally or not), are better off dropped, in my opinion.

Chelsea: Dean is the definition of "WE WERE ALL ROOTING FOR YOU!" He had so much good will going into Paradise and was becoming a Bachelor frontrunner, but he could not have screwed up worse than his Paradise performance. He really showed just how immature he was and how he does need to work on being able to communicate before beginning a relationship. He led both of those girls on and they both need to never look back. DLo does have some fault in this scenario but it was clear from the time they got back to Paradise that Kristina and Dean weren’t a solid couple. They both needed to communicate with one another more clearly about their situation.

For some crazy reason, contestants weren’t feeling Ben Z. this summer. Were you sad to see him go home to his puppy? Which other contestants did you want more of? 


Rebecca: I definitely was sad to see Ben Z go home, but it was his time and Zeus needed him. I also wish Kristina could have stuck around, but if I was in her situation, I would have left too. I kind of wish Fred would have stayed around a bit, as Rachel was so dismissive to him when he was on her season and we didn’t get to see much of him. Normally, I would say I wanted more of the twins, since they were such a treasure last season, but they were nasty this time around. I’m positive their return was a publicity stunt to spice up the season, because they were acting completely out of character — or else fame has REALLY gone to their heads. I’m all for the bubbly, fun-loving, easy-going, unfiltered, ditzy twins we’ve seen in the past, but this time, they were rude, whiny, and just flat out mean, especially to Tickle Monster and Serial Killer. No thanks. I’m completely turned off by them now.

Alisa: Okay, well, Ben Z. is a national treasure and even though of course I was sad to see him go, it’s not like we were seeing much of him all season anyway, other than dumb edits that made him look boring. But honestly, every time I have to travel away from my pups, all I do is talk about them and show people pics of them, so I feel ya, Ben. Basically, Ben Z. is like the beautiful chiseled-jaw boy version of me and I am here for it. Give him and Zeus their own show! If ABC won’t, can we Kickstarter it?

Chelsea: Ben Z. is a treasure and proper gentleman, and I cannot believe that a single woman didn’t go after him. The show gave him a horrible edit but even through that, you could see that he was a genuine, caring guy. He would have been the best Bachelor behind Wells. Kristina or literally any of the other girls needs to go back and reconsider Ben Z. I think the show needed to feature more of Diggy and Dom. They had a really great date and we didn’t see much else of them. Also, how did grown adult with a doll Adam, Ticklemonster, and Serial Killer Jack Stone get more love this summer than Ben Z.? It’s ridiculous.

This whole season was such a disappointment.

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