Friday, July 3, 2015

'Pretty Little Liars' Rosewood Roundup ("She's No Angel") [Contributor: Megan Mann]

Aria Montgomery, the dumbest girl in school (or, well, not in school because DO THE LIARS EVER ACTUALLY ATTEND CLASS? HOW ARE THEY GRADUATING?)

Rosewood Roundup: "She's No Angel"
(Original Airdate: June 30, 2015)

Hello! Welcome to another week of the Rosewood Roundup!

You guys, I’m freaking out. This week was another “got a few answers, got even more questions” episode and was by far one of the creepiest yet. Wait, am I going to keep saying that every week? Oh, god. My soul! Okay, let’s get started.

Although I thought that there have been some creepy scenes in the preceding episodes, I don’t think that there has been a creepier scene than the opening sequence this week. We start in Spencer’s nightmare that was very reminiscent of the creepy house over in Ravenswood (when we found Ezra’s lair). Clearly, those cookies are not treating you well, Spencer. Stop eating them. Anyway, she starts walking and finds herself in a tiled room with two tubs and a very strange girl. It’s very haunting. The girl starts to move around the room (hey, Maddie Ziegler, haaaaaaay. Was wondering when you were going to show up) and Spencer wakes up wondering what it could mean.

When she’s talking to Aria on the phone, I forget that they’re still in high school and remember that I’m really excited for this impending time jump. Spencer throws her cookies in her bag and I’m like yeah, because that’s a good idea. Take your weed cookies to school. Brilliant.

Hanna walks into her kitchen to find Mona sitting there. I was wondering where she was. She starts freaking out and acting shifty about the cops being there 24/7. They’re there for everyone’s protection, Mona. Get with the program. (Take off the shades. You’re already shady enough.) She wishes she had never come back to Rosewood. It seems that after escaping the dollhouse, she retreated to a spa, which no one can blame her for. She seems to have come out of it less scarred than the other girls but that could simply be because A was much nicer to her. And instead of being scared of A, Mona’s now scared of being in the same zip code as Ali. “I sent her to jail, Hanna. For months. There’s no way she’s not plotting some kind of revenge.” Mona’s also scared of going to the police to discuss her whole not-dead thing. She’s worried she’ll get in trouble for being alive when they launched a full-scale investigation into her supposed murder. She’s worried the cops won’t protect her.

Across town, Ali overhears a cop speaking negatively about her. Meanwhile, Sarah finally calls her mom and grows frustrated because her mother is clearly intoxicated. When Emily suggests they go to a movie later, Sarah tells her that she has to go home. Emily refuses to accept this and asks if she thinks her mother can make money off of what happened to her. “Probably but I have to deal with her.” Obviously the best choice is for Sarah to get emancipated. Duh.

Over at Hollis, Clark (who I knew was going to be back because he was given a name) asks Aria if she wants to go and shoot in a junkyard. He tells her she has a good eye and that it’s exactly what they’re looking for. “What who’s looking for?” she asks. He swore the two discussed the contest for a fellowship, cash prize and summer internship with a magazine. When he tells her it’s in LA, I think she’s going to put her smart pants on and stick with the “I have a lot of work to do” line, but nope. She sees it as a way to get out of Rosewood and seriously upsets me by agreeing to go with an ALMOST ABSOLUTE STRANGER to some abandoned junkyard. Cool life, Aria. This is why people think you’re A.

Ali sits outside and tells her dad that she simply needed some fresh air. She tells him how sad she is to have overheard what the cop said about her causing so many problems and putting so many people behind bars. Instead of understanding, Papa DiLaurentis tells her to let it go and own it. “Bad behavior has a way of catching up to you.”

“You would know.” OH, BURN, ALI. YOU GO, GIRL.

Mona is seriously freaked out about being back in Rosewood and is acting super skittish at the coffee shop. She turns around and sees Leslie calling to her and I’m like wait, you’re still in Rosewood? You live somewhere else. I digress. It turns out that she was summoned by the police as Mona made her an accomplice to a crime. Mona is as equally confused as the rest of us as to how she’s an accomplice to a crime and Leslie goes on a rant about making the mistake of complimenting a girl on her Dolce & Gabbana stretch pants and how she’s put everything from her fellowship to her teaching position to her reputation in jeopardy because of Mona. Hanna tells Leslie to go easy on Mona and that she didn’t think up the plan to put Ali away to hurt Leslie. She says that she didn’t actually want perjury on her resume and Hanna, with one of the best lines, says, “I don’t know what that means, but I really don’t like your tone.” (My sister personally enjoyed when she called Hanna “a bag of hair.”) Mona asks them to stop and apologizes, but Leslie isn’t having it. She doesn’t even want her name mentioned. She’s all full of threats when she says that she believes in payback too. We haven’t seen the last of her.

Hanna and Spencer are discussing the conversation and then move towards talking about sex and it’s suddenly super awkward and I don’t know why. But it does make sense that Hanna is miffed that Caleb is treating her like a delicate flower. Clearly her anger is fueling her in all sorts of new ways. She’s not delicate. Spencer advises her to stay out of the whole Mona mess but Hanna refuses to do that. Mona is the key to helping them figure out what happened at Radley and Hanna refuses to believe Charles is dead until they have absolute proof. A headstone is clearly not enough for her. Spencer pulls out her cookies, IN THE MIDDLE OF SCHOOL AND ALL, and when Hanna tries to grab one, she smacks her hand away. Hanna can tell that something is up and asks her if she’s buzzed. Spencer immediately jumps on the defense and Hanna doesn’t buy it.

And we go from awkward to creepy. Again, Aria, “embracing the creepy” by constantly photographing dolls does not help your case. You keep adding wood to the “Aria is A” fire. Anyway, she and Clarke talk photography and he asks her if she wants to have dinner later that evening. She declines and says she’s not really dating anymore. He tells her she doesn’t need to explain as he recognized her from the news. That was actually nice of him to not bring that up until now. What a guy.

Ali is sitting in her living room with the “let me flirt with you because I’m a creep” newbie cop and talk about her being a youth soccer coach for the church because he thinks she could make a difference. Saucy Mr. DiLaurentis walks in and fights with Ali about McCreepy Cop being there after another cop had insulted her. He kicks McCreepy (okay, fine. Lorenzo) out and death glares are exchanged.

Rosewood’s Reigning Disney Prince Caleb is recruited to help Sarah. Emily gets snippy when he asks her if Sarah’s ever had a job and says that’s not what this is about. Caleb corrects her by saying that Sarah needs a job to show that she has a means of supporting herself and that she must also have a diploma. Emily is all, “oh, right. That makes sense.” (#thingsyoummightknowifyouactuallywenttoclass) Caleb reminds them that emancipation is not an easy process and it would just be easier for Sarah to go home and ride out the last few months before she turns 18. Emily disagrees and says that every moment is precious. Not at all dramatic, right?

Spencer has an awkward moment at an addicts meeting and runs into that smoking hot ex-sponsor of hers, Dean. Elsewhere, Aria and Clark start to develop some film and Aria sees the same shadow she thought was A at the junkyard in one of Clarke’s photos -- a.k.a., a creepy person in a hood. She calls Emily to say that he has potentially snapped a shot of A and Emily tells her not to let loose any details of what’s been going on. She doesn’t want Sarah to be targeted, but Aria reminds her she's the one being followed not Sarah. So Emily tells Aria to borrow the photos. The two hang up and Emily goes back to Sarah and Caleb where Caleb offers her a job with his web design company. Yay, progress!

Leslie seeks out Hanna and apologizes for the way she previously acted. She said her anger is with Mona, not Hanna. Leslie makes a good point: “I can’t help but wonder if that Radley place helped her or made her worse.” Hanna tells her that even though it closed down, it still holds all of the answers. Instead of asking further questions, Leslie says that it’s better left to the police. Oh, look. Someone making a smart choice and sticking to it. How refreshing!

(Also, as an aside: duh. Aria obviously stole the photos, guys.)

Spencer gets a ride home from Dean and asks if he’d like to come in, but he declines. She tells him that she hadn’t been to a meeting in a while but that it was for reassurance purposes only. Pfffft. Liar. She says that a few bites of a cookie helps relieve her stress or helps her sleep and it’s not really harming anyone. “Doesn’t work like that. You can’t rationalize. You’re either in or you’re out.” Dean tells Spencer that just because she’s transitioning between nightmares, it doesn’t mean she’s not strong. She needs to believe in her strength or she’s not going to get anywhere. He says she can call him whenever she needs to, even if it’s just to chat. What a nice guy. And thank god she gave him the cookies. They were probably going to go stale soon anyway.

When she goes to walk in the house, Spencer sees Mona leaving a card for Alison which presumably held an apology. She makes a terrible joke about Spencer looking better than the last time she saw her. (No one laughed.) Since Mona had been down in A's lair the longest, Spencer decides to broach the topic of whether or not the little girl from her nightmare was also down there. She’s looking for answers where they aren’t and describes the creepy tiled room with broken furniture. Does it really live in her head or does Mona know something?

Hanna and Spencer go to Radley to try to find some answers. When they’re walking the halls, Spencer stops and sees a mural on the wall of the little girl from her dream. Hanna asks what’s wrong and instead of telling her, Spencer lies. Again. Ugh. The girls find the room that was in Spencer’s nightmare. Of course it was Radley. But what was that room used for? GIVE ME ANSWERS. While looking through the room, Spencer finds a file on Charles and sees that he’s dead. Hanna still refuses to believe he’s dead even though she can clearly see the paperwork that says his organs were transported elsewhere... something that can’t happen unless you’re dead. “Someone is pretending to be him. So who is it? Who is Charles?” Good question, Hanna. I would like to know as well. She knocks some papers into one of the tubs and the girls gasp. They think they see a body and thank god it’s a dummy and not a real human because I did not sign up for that.

Aria, meanwhile, is trying to enlarge the photo of maybe-A. (Aria, you just have this type of equipment at home? That’s some fancy stuff.) Anyway, when she enlarges the photo, she sees a hooded figure that is very obviously a girl. Which follows up with my previous question from last week’s roundup: could A be the long lost Bethany? If this is A, and A is a girl, could some people’s Cece theory finally come to fruition?

While all of this was happening, Sarah finds out she’s allowed to stay with Emily and decides now is the best time to get a tattoo. You know, because they’re 17 and have very little funds. That totally makes sense. Totally. At the tattoo parlor, Sarah gets a little tweaked out when she sees the group text on Emily's phone about A potentially being a girl. Does that mean that Sarah’s in league with A? She can’t possibly be A, as she was with Emily at the pool when A was tracking them last week, but she could definitely be part of it. Why else would she get so worked up? She freaks out and yells at Emily for not telling her that they were on the hunt for A. Emily explains that she was protecting her and before much more could be said, a hooded shadow is moving towards them. The girls take off and I’m not okay.

Spencer and Hanna freak out when they encounter Mona unexpectedly. Mona, if you were coming for something, why not come with the girls and find it out together? What exactly do you have in your hands? “ANSWER US!” Yeah, Mona. GIVE US WHAT YOU KNOW. She asks to be let go and that she’ll explain later. We learn that... wait. Leslie was a patient at Radley? And she was there long enough to know both Mona AND Charles? Wait, IS LESLIE A? That can’t be right. I won’t buy into this theory. Moving on.

Hanna tells Ali to get over to her house and fast. because of the giant Leslie/A news. Daddy DiLaurentis isn’t having it and Ali throws some serious shade. Clearly, he has no idea Charles was buried at Aunt Carol’s. See? Hanna is already on the "Leslie is A" train. That’s not cool. There’s just no way. Whoa. Wait... Leslie was roommates with the long forgotten Bethany Young. I knew she had a role to play in all of this after all!

Mona calls Leslie and says she couldn’t do it. The girls know. What do they know? Do they know that Leslie is A? Or simply that she was at Radley, was roommates with Bethany Young and was there long enough to know Charles? Leslie is now suspect #1 and the Liars are on a witch-hunt.

Is Leslie really A? Could it be that strange? If so, what would be her motive? Or is she just a means of some sort of answer? And why is A making a new Aria doll? What is he/she going to do with it? So much happened this week and I feel like we’re just about to spiral out of control. (Thus the extremely long recap. Sorry not sorry. Too many clues.)

However, I would like to congratulate myself for pointing out last week that A placed trackers in the girls when they were in the dollhouse. A lot of people assumed I was nuts and that wasn’t possible, but I’m here to high five myself for stating the obvious.

See you in two weeks for another whirlwind hour of TV torture!


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