Wednesday, February 17, 2016

Brooklyn Nine-Nine 3x16 Recap: "House Mouses" (When Idols Fall) [Contributor: Alisa Williams]

“House Mouses”
Original Airdate: February 16, 2016

One of my favorite things about Brooklyn Nine-Nine is how they hit you with hilarity from the opening scene and never let up. This episode begins with the detectives rummaging through (and completely decimating) an extravagant gift basket full of amazing French food. Only Gina has the presence of mind to realize that this is probably a gift from Captain Holt’s boyfriend who’s been in Paris for what seems like forever. Oops.

Their solution is to frantically grab random office supplies (a stapler, tape dispenser, rubber-bands) and wrap them back up in the gift basket and cellophane. Captain Holt, being who he is, LOVES this gift. “That man really knows me!” he exclaims, while clutching the gigantic package of rubber-bands to his chest and grinning from ear-to-ear. I love this show.

After the close call with the gift basket, Captain Holt has an announcement: a high-profile celebrity was robbed in their precinct, but because of the sensitive nature of the case, Holt can only reveal details (including who the celebrity is) to the lead detective on the case. Terry is left in charge of assigning said detective.

Jake wants the case and begs Terry to assign it to him, but Terry refuses because Jake already had a case assigned to him this morning: a minor drug bust. Jake tries to shirk that case by asking that it be assigned to Hitchcock and Scully, but as Terry explains, “they’re house mouses. They do paperwork and they’re good at it. They don’t go out in the field.” I question whether Hitchcock and Scully are actually good at paperwork, but I suppose they must be good at something besides eating their weight in food each episode.

Jake’s powers of persuasion fail and the celebrity case is assigned to Boyle, but since he and Jake are besties, Jake says he’ll secretly work it with him and hand his drug bust case over to Hitchcock and Scully anyway. I can’t recall that we’ve ever really seen these two out in the field in the three seasons this show has existed, so this should prove interesting.

Meanwhile, Amy is going around with a clipboard trying to get people to sign up for a blood drive when she realizes Rosa hasn’t ever participated in one. Amy’s delighted to find out Rosa is scared of something and this leads the ladies to a discussion on fears. Gina reveals she’s scared of business men. “A whole army of grey-suited Brads and Chads trying to suck my soul and redeem it for frequent flyer miles.” I’m right there with you, Gina.

Amy’s solution is that they all face their fears together today. Because apparently neither Amy nor Rosa have cases to worry about.

Jake manages to lure Hitchcock and Scully out of the station to a nearby diner for lunch and a pep-talk to convince them to take his case. His plan works and Hitchcock and Scully are in, though I think the pep-talk was probably unnecessary. I’m guessing bribing them solely with food would have been sufficient.

Boyle learns the details on his high-profile celebrity case, which as expected, is no one anyone has ever heard of except Holt and probably Amy. The celebrity is John William Weichselbraun, a world-renowned oboist who is First Chair with the New York Symphony Orchestra. Weichselbraun’s $40,000 oboe was stolen from his apartment and Holt admits he would love to work the case himself but it might cause concerns of preferential treatment. Never fear though, because Boyle’s on it. But before Boyle can even exit Holt’s office, Holt has decided to covertly help with the case. This leaves Boyle in a bit of a situation: secretly working the case with both Jake and Boyle.

As Boyle and Holt head out to interview Weichselbraun, Jake learns the “celebrity” was just an oboist, while the seemingly minor drug bust is actually tied to a whole narcotics ring, and could be the biggest take-down in precinct history. Unfortunately, Hitchcock and Scully are not answering their phones, so Terry and Jake are on the hunt to find them and make sure they don’t mess up this huge drug bust. It only takes about five minutes to find Scully since he stopped on the way for hot dogs covered in chocolate sauce (gross). Hitchcock is still MIA .

Holt and Boyle visit Weichselbraun in his extremely modest apartment. Holt completely dissolves into a puddle in front of his oboist idol. During this epic dissent into fangirldom, we learn Weichselbraun is nicknamed the “Silver Spit Prince.” Thank you, Captain Holt, for that gem I can never un-hear.

Unfortunately, it seems Weichselbraun staged the robbery of his prized oboe for the insurance money, a fact Boyle quickly uncovers. Poor Holt. It’s tough to see our idols fall, and he does not take it well.

Back at the station, the ladies are facing their fears. Amy goes first by locking herself into the trunk of a squad car to overcome her fear of claustrophobia. It does not go well. Then it’s Gina’s turn to infiltrate a business lunch meeting, dressed in a drab, grey suit (borrowed from Amy). She fares better than Amy did in the trunk. By episode’s end, even Rosa has faced her fear of giving blood, and handles it far better than the other two, yelling her way through it all in true Rosa fashion.

Terry, Jake, and Scully race to find the still-missing Hitchcock, who is busy going undercover with the drug ring. They arrive just in time to see Hitchcock being kidnapped. Then manage to get themselves kidnapped as well. Fortunately, thanks to Hitchcock’s unique talent of being able to roll his chair anywhere (even up a flight of stairs), and Scully’s profuse sweating (and subsequent ability to get unbound from his duct tape), they are able to escape, capture the drug ring, and make the most epic bust in precinct history.

I loved this episode, as I do every episode, but I also greatly appreciated that Hitchcock and Scully got their own case to work. Not only did they accomplish their mission, but I can now successfully tell them apart, so it’s really a win-win all around.

Bullets on the Bulletin Board:
  • “What do we do?” “Eat the note!”
  • “A very important, very high-profile celebrity was robbed in our precinct.” “What celebrity, sir? Is it a Chris? Hemsworth? Evans? Pratt? Pine? Brown? Cross? Is it a non-Chris?!!”
  • “You can’t give this case to Amy. The last movie she saw was a documentary about spelling bees.” “Wrong! It was about the font Helvetica and it played like an action thriller.”
  • “I don’t like being stabbed by someone so they can steal my blood.” 
  • “We are what the Internet sometimes refers to as... Weichselbraun-fans.” “Not Weichselbrauniacs?” “Oh, that’s very good. I’m going to use that liberally!”
  • “They’re detectives. They’ve been on the force for 500 years. They know what they’re doing.” “The only item on Scully’s calendar for the entire year is ‘eat peanut butter.’” “Yeah, we gotta find them.” 
  • “Residual cushion fart is about a six out of 10, so he’s been gone an hour, maybe two.”
  • “Oh, I get it. Just because I got my finger stuck in a glue trap once, I’m a mouse? I got the cheese out, by the way.” 
  • “You keep saying ‘celebrity’ but he’s drying his socks on a George Foreman grill.” 
  • “I know he’s guilty. I’m just chagrined. Deeply chagrined.”


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