Blindspot 3x06 Review: "Adoring Suspect" (Happy Ending) [Contributor: Jen]

"Adoring Suspect"

Original Airdate: December 8, 2017

Blindspot forces us to question what a happy ending means to Jane Doe in "Adoring Suspect." My answer may be surprising to some of you.

CASE OF THE WEEK

One of Jane's tattoos matches the logo of a Russian production company named Sacred Lynx Productions. They are a major backer of Keith Rhodes movies, the Blindspot version of Tom Cruise. Unfortunately, Sacred Lynx Productions is run by Nico Popov, leader of the Brigada (an international terrorism syndicate). Nico never leaves Moscow unless he's scouting an attack. So when Popov is spotted in a photograph with Keith Rhodes, the team knows there's an attack imminent on U.S. soil. Kurt poses as an FBI consultant for Keith's latest movie, and away we go!

This is about as meta as Blindspot gets and even Kurt Weller brings the funny. But of course, no one does funny like Rich Dotcom and he does not disappoint in "Adoring Suspect." Key word: adoring. Rich Dotcom is a total fanboy and it's glorious (with lines like: "The man has a Moon Man Award for Best Kiss. How dare you!?")

All the locations used to shoot Keith's movies are all home to major weapons plants. The Brigada uses international film productions to transport weapons of mass destruction to the target cities. Keith's latest movie was filmed in Omske, where they make Cyclosarin: a nerve agent with no antidote.

The ending is a foregone conclusion. Team Blindspot stops the Brigada from dropping a nerve agent on New York City. But we do get Jane and Rich undercover. Rich poses as a screenwriter and pitches his movie to Booky Bentley. The team needs Booky to say certain words so they can break into his safe. Rich's improvisation is solid gold hilarity from start to finish.

TEAM BLINDSPOT

Patterson and Zapata loop Jeller in on Hirst being the source of all evil. Unlike Reade, it doesn't take much to convince Kurt and Jane. They've danced this dance before. If Patterson says Hirst is dirty, then she's dirty.

Zapata wants to start building their own database of Jane's tattoos outside of the FBI and out of reach from Hirst. They need the metal disc that triggers Jane's new tattoos and that's in lock-up. Zapata comes up with a CIA way to sneak the disc out (inside a flask), but Reade interrupts and takes the flask from them. He insists they have Hirst's back because she has theirs. Boy, really? You are trying my patience, sir. Since when do you throw Zapata overboard for Hirst? What planet am I on? What color is the sky in this new world you've created Reade?

To his credit, Reade does question Hirst on her relationship with Kevin Loewe. One of Jane's tattoos lead to some dirty dealings by Loewe and Hirst never disclosed that she went to college with both Loewe and his wife. However, when Reade pushes for more information on their relationship, Hirst not so subtly threatens to reveal Reade's past drug use.

Two seconds later, Reade is at Weller's door with the flask and disc in hand. Weller tells Reade he's a  little late the party and opens the door. Operation Stop Hirst is in full swing. YASSS! I love all my children united. Take that, Roman.

KURT AND JANE

And the lies continue, but we knew they would. Jane tells Patterson that she's not going to pursue finding her daughter, saying: "This girl has been living her own life for 18 years without me and all the stuff that comes with me. Whatever she's doing, I'll just make everything more complicated for her." Patterson responds, "But maybe she's looking for the truth."

I love you, Patterson. Never change. Patterson gives Kurt the contact information of the nurse who helped deliver Jane's baby. She wants Kurt to check it out and is absolutely confident that if there's anything there, he will immediately tell Jane.

Unfortunately we, as the audience, are not so confident. This is such a sad feeling because we want to have faith in Kurt and believe he's doing the right thing. His intentions may be good, but that doesn't make what he's doing any less wrong.

Surprisingly, Rich Dotcom offers Jane some wonderful advice on the whole missing daughter dilemma, saying: "I just feel like your story deserves a happy ending." Rich believes if Jane finds her daughter, she'll find the happiness she deserves. But Jane believes she's already found it in Kurt. Sadly, we can't even enjoy the smooches and the heart eyes because now we're in on Kurt's dirty little secret! You took my heart eyes from me, Weller! What has become of us? We are mere shell of what we once were. FIX IT NOW.

Blindspot seems to be implying that Jane's happy ending will either be her daughter or Kurt, but I don't believe that's the case. She can have both and absolutely needs both of these people in her life. However, I don't think Avery or Kurt can give Jane the happy ending she seeks. That has to come from inside.

Even in her life with Kurt in Colorado, Jane was restless. She needs to help people. Being Kurt Weller's wife and only his wife, wasn't enough for Jane. She needs something to define herself outside of their relationship.

It will be the same as motherhood. It's okay to find something outside of your children to define yourself with. Just because you are a mother doesn't mean you suddenly have no other interests, ambitions, or desires. It's good to explore them and, more often than not, it makes you a better parent.

Jane continually looks to other people to fill the holes inside of her. First it was Taylor Shaw, then Oscar, then Roman and Sheppard, and finally Kurt. Jane found the most joy and peace with Kurt because she is the best version of herself when she is with him. That doesn't mean Kurt Weller will fulfill every need Jane ever has though. The same can be said of Avery.

Jane is convinced Avery is better off without her and no amount of love or encouragement from Kurt has changed her mind. This self-hatred is something Kurt's love can help, but it can't fix. Not entirely. What Jane needs is to find a sense of peace and acceptance within herself. Weller and Avery can be part of that process, and will help immensely with getting Jane there, but ultimately she has walk some of this path alone. Jane has to sort out what or who she needs to be happy and fulfilled. And she can't always look to Kurt for the answers. Kurt is her starting point, that's true, but he doesn't have to hold her hand every step of the way.

And if Kurt understands that then he'll realize he doesn't have to lie to Jane to protect her from pain. Kurt needs to let go a little of Jane, as terrifying as that sounds. He doesn't have to fix everything or have all the answers. Kurt just needs to be there like a save haven. The problem is, Kurt is terrified if he lets Jane fly then she'll never come back.  It's ultimately a self fulfilling prophecy. Kurt is robbing Jane of the security she so desperately needs to be brave enough to face all the unanswered questions inside of herself.

Kurt's lie is going to damage his relationship with Jane severely. However, I don't believe we are dealing with seasons one or two Kurt and Jane. They may break, but I don't believe the relationship will be broken. I don't believe we'll be headed for divorce court. This is all part of the Blindspot puzzle. Kurt, Jane, Avery, Jane's self acceptance, Kurt letting go — these are all pieces of that puzzle. The trick is figuring out how they all fit together. But they will. Eventually, they'll see the full picture, and that's when Jane will have her happy ending.

Stray Thoughts:

• Roman continues his manipulation with Blake. I want to ship it so much, but he's just so evil.
• There are days when I want to love Roman, but then I remember he killed Tom and deprived me of more Daniel Lissing. I just cannot forgive him for that.
• Can we have an episode of Roman and Kurt hanging out and speaking in Australian accents? We can bring Tom back to life too. They can all grab a beer. That's solid television.
• "Destroy her? Or her love for you?" Sorry Kurt, it's 100% the latter. Roman nailed you on that one.
• "It's what we on the dark web call the good stuff." I cackled. More Rich Dotcom always please.
• "Oooh... I see." Patterson is like Penny from Inspector Gadget. Maybe she should join the CIA.
• Could we not fire guns around chemical weapons? That be neat.

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Series: Superhero of the Week -- Week 3 [Contributor: Jen]

The giant Arrowverse crossover, "Crisis on Earth-X," brought nearly all of the superheroes from across the universe into a four-night extravaganza. Everyone teams up to stop Earth-X Nazis when they crash Barry and Iris’ wedding and nearly every character has more than one stand-out moment. However, there is only one who truly shone more than all the rest...

SUPERHERO OF THE WEEK: Martin Stein (Legends of Tomorrow)

Source

It is Stein who makes the ultimate hero’s sacrifice: he gives up his life to save another. He is shot when he charges into gunfire to turn on a console crucial to getting all the heroes home. His injuries are so severe that the only way to keep him alive and get him home is for Jackson to merge with him as Firestorm. Once aboard the Waverider, Jackson’s body is affected by Stein’s injury and he begins to die as well.

Professor Stein tells Jefferson that it’s time to let him go. It is the most moving scene in the entire crossover and one of the most devastating deaths in the DCTV universe. Professor Stein touched many of the heroes' lives, particularly those on The Flash, but he was universally liked and respected. No one felt his death more than the Legends and no one was more devastated than Jefferson Jackson.

Professor Stein uses his last moments to impart some final wisdom on Jefferson and us all. Stein does not want to die. He very much wants to retire from the hero business and live out the rest of his days with his wife, daughter, and new grandson. He was, in fact, on the impetus of this retirement and the battle with the Nazis was his final mission. However, Stein also recognizes he has lived a long, full, and happy life. In the years they were Firestorm together, Jackson and Professor Stein formed a father and son bond. Stein simply wants to ensure that his son has the same chance for the long life he has enjoyed. It is a wondrous act of heroism, and a simple act of fatherhood. No real father would do any less for their child.

Stein tells Jackson to live for today because life is gone in a blink. He wishes him love and joy. Stein also thanks Jackson “for the adventure of a lifetime.” He goes peacefully, with Jackson holding his hand.

Professor’s Stein’s final words are also the impetus for the impromptu wedding of both Barry and Iris, and Oliver and Felicity. These two couples take to heart that they’ve just come from the funeral of a fallen friend who lived his life for the fullest and decide not to waste another moment of their own. They are inspired to live their lives full of love, joy and adventure. Together.

And that’s the very essence of a superhero. They inspire us all to live our best life.

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Dystopia Now: The Death of Diversity and Freedom Under the New FCC [Contributor: Melanie]

“This is for everyone.” — Tim Berners-Lee, creator of the Internet

You sit down at the computer your parents bought you on refurb for Christmas (because they like helping our their impressive college graduate who finally got their own apartment at the age of 28). You open your browser and watch that little spinning wheel turn and turn. You’re connected to WiFi, and the signal’s fine. But you’re drumming your fingers on the counter. You’re staring at the wall, waiting. You’re a newly minted grad student with a job just slightly above minimum wage — because that’s the going rate for over 20 years of education — and you couldn’t afford the premium broadband package from your providers.

When you finally do get the Internet working, you go straight to your email and then log off. You haven’t been able to get on Netflix in months because the streaming fee to the providers is just too steep for your budget. In addition to being way behind in your binge-watching of Mindhunter, you also couldn’t watch that amazing documentary on poverty that all the people who can afford streaming services are talking about. You had that idea for a start-up you floated in college. But there’s no way you can afford the bandwidth fee the providers require for average access to a website. Your telemetry monitoring app will just never see the light of day and that promise you made to your grandma after her heart attack was just an irresponsible pipe dream you couldn’t afford. You really should be grateful for that retail job and weekend job as a bike courier. You’ll get over not having the Internet and get over not being able to take more online classes to finally get your teaching certificate.

This is not the distant year of 2049 where the ozone is gone and resources are depleted. This is 2018. And you are every single person living in the United States.

If this sounds dystopian, that’s because it is. This is the very real future waiting for us on the other side of that New Year’s ball drop unless we make a lot of noise. The current FCC chair, Ajit Pai (a former lawyer for Verizon), has taken unprecedented actions toward the repeal of net neutrality. While a reclassification of broadband providers from Title II common carriers to Title I information services was expected, what Mr. Pai proposes is a carte blanche for ISP (Internet service providers) across the Internet where they can essentially do whatever they want (block content, charge for any services, require websites to pay fees to even be seen by users) as long as they disclose this in their contracts and to the FCC.

Why does this matter to you, reader? Well let’s say your favorite blog suddenly goes dark because they can’t afford to the fees required to ALL the providers their users might possible utilize in order to be seen. Are you a freelancer? There goes the ability to get your Internet-based portfolio seen because your website suddenly won’t load for potential clients unless you shell out more money. Let’s say you are a single parent, trying to get a degree online so you can actually afford to feed your kids. Suddenly, that ability could be gone. There are a million other real-life scenarios that show just how detrimental this will be. But, you know, it’s gonna make some guy in a big office really rich and keep you really poor so you can never do something about it.

There are a lot of scenarios I could go into regarding net neutrality. But this is an entertainment journalism website, so let’s talk about how this affects that. It seems frivolous, right? Talking about how this hurts our ability to watch TV and movies online. And, yes, it is very much a “first world problem” but it’s also a very, very real one. We’re in the golden age of digital content. Anyone can film something, put it on YouTube for free, and watch it flourish. The result is a boom in entertainment media — unchecked and unhindered by rules and regulations and censorship. The 2012 webseries The Lizzie Bennet Diaries changed the way content creators could use YouTube and users could interact with it, earning the first Emmy ever for a web-based show. The quick, 4-minute segments utilizing just a single camera and Jane Austen source material was completely innovative and spawned an entire network and more of web-based shows on the YouTube platform.

One such show that owes its vitality to Lizzie Bennet is the rabidly popular 2015 webseries Carmilla, a modern updating of the 19th century novella of the same name. Now this one’s important because this is a show that would never see funding on network TV and, if it did, would likely tank into a non-renewal due to ratings. That’s not because it’s bad. In fact, it won a Canadian Screen Award, has 70 million views on YouTube, and its team produced a feature-length film after the series’ conclusion. But soccer moms complaining about Starbucks holiday cups aren’t exactly the target audience for a YA television series about lesbians and non-binary people. This was born to become digital content and had a niche in YouTube’s open channels. Carmilla essentially a ready audience waiting on the Internet — where society had forced virtually all members of the LGBTQ community to go in order to express themselves.

So what could the future of Carmilla look like in a non-net neutrality world? Maybe Verizon doesn’t like the series. Maybe there’s one or several complainers who decide they want to block access to Carmilla’s website for U.S. Internet users. Well they can’t stop the show’s YouTube stream, since Goolge owns that. But maybe they decide that the idea of streaming webseries on unrestricted websites needs to be discouraged. So they hike prices in order to discourage fans from viewing it and discourage creators from producing it, or series like it. Suddenly the Internet has been censored.

Another show with an even deeper entrenchment into LGBTQ culture is Sense8, a Netflix-owned action, sci-fi drama with a cult following from the same siblings that brought you The Matrix. This show has it all: the Gays™, queer people of color, transgender characters, polyamorous relationships, etc. You know, the stuff that our current VP absolutely loves.

So maybe in this brave new world, it is decided that this needs to shut down too. Maybe Netflix suddenly has to pay an arm and a leg to get accessed by users. That show already faced some difficulty in even getting a second season, only to be canceled before a third... until the outcry of fans earned a wrap-up of the story. That hard-earned victory for those individuals who see themselves in the characters on Sense8 will vanish too.

Over on Hulu, The Handmaid’s Tale — the incredibly popular and well-received adaptation of the dystopian novel of the same name — gets some red tape because it too goes through a streaming service. And we can’t have a show about a totalitarian society under the yoke of the elite when that’s exactly what is being done, right? The Handmaid’s Tale has been an inflammatory piece of media, inspiring protesters to utilize its world and message as a way to put a concrete face on a looming and dark world. Perhaps providers don’t like the show’s iconic imagery and ability to exactly pinpoint the problems of society and how they escalate. So maybe they throttle service there too until users just stop trying to access it and creators just stop trying to get heard.

Okay, that’s an extreme example, but a valid one. Net neutrality could turn into the new book burning if people are not careful (and they won’t be). Information has changed and the ideas surrounding it have not. Just because it’s not bound in a book, doesn’t mean it’s not a piece of education. There’s a fundamental flaw in the way providers and the FCC define the Internet. It’s not just a playground that we should pay the toll for — it’s a school, a counselor’s room, and a safe space for expression too. And it’s one of the few places where it can be all those things and completely free at the same time. The Internet is a place where information is stored and shared, available to all. We’re not just talking about long-distance poker games and Facebook; we’re talking about data repositories, the Google Book project, academic blogging, literary and film content relevant to our culture, expression and places of discourse for those without a community of their own. Under this repeal, it will all come under the control and the domain of Internet providers with money signs in their eyes.

The fact of the matter is, Carmilla was offered freely. The teenager looking for validation in the media has a free three seasons of show to consume. And when Shaftesbury crowdsourced their film based on the series, all it required was a $15 donation that went right toward the production budget and not anyone’s pocket. Sense8 goes through a network that operates on a small monthly fee of about $9-11 in exchange for unlimited access to its plethora of original and licensed content. Hulu sits at just $7.99 a month for a subscription. Add in the brave new world of no net neutrality protecting those websites? You get higher prices and content that won’t be as freely available. Maybe it stops completely.

And then there are the public libraries operating on a barely-there budget that can’t afford to get good bandwidth for their digital collections. There’s the start-up that can’t get off the ground and suddenly the entire concept of the American Dream is gone (a.k.a. exposed as the elitist lie it is, but whatever). There’s a parent who can’t get an education so they can get a better job so they can take care of their kids.

Even my ability — or the ability of any of the other contributors on this site — to share thoughts and analysis on entertainment media will suddenly be challenged. The ability of private bloggers to continue getting their work seen, the ability of free writing on the Internet might go away entirely if sites like Just About Write can’t continue to flourish because our editor is suddenly being asked to fork out a lot more money just to be accessible to our loyal and fairly substantial following that was built over years of hard work.

Now, will all of this despair come to pass? Probably not. But we all also said Donald Trump probably wouldn’t be elected president and yet, here we are. The odds this time are lot less sure. The FCC is Republican-controlled, and that is a party with a history of transphobic, homophobic, and one-percent favoring legislation. Now that they intend to hand over the keys to information freedom, what’s to stop them from shutting down websites dedicated to the exact opposite of their belief systems? It’s a scary world of Dystopia Now. All we know for sure is that, if passed, this will change the way we interact with information and the Internet forever.

So, what can you do? Well, for starters, call your senator. This isn’t a congressional decision, though the FCC will have to answer to Congress after their vote. And for those of you who don’t have to deal with the reclusive coward that is Pat Toomey, you have a shot of actually getting in contact with your legislators! Don’t know who they are? Use this site to input your address, find out your rep’s contact information, and get cracking. Want to get even louder? Join the nationwide protest December 7th, using this to find your nearest protest.

And honestly? Just talk about it. Ignore that one great-aunt this holiday season who is always yelling at you for bringing up politics. Talk about this. Whether or not you care about some diverse TV shows getting knocked off the face of the Internet or some indie review sites losing their ability to express themselves, or the your neighbor who might not be able to afford the Internet and all the education it provides, you at least have to care about your own ability to get online without discrimination.

So do something about this. We didn’t take Trump seriously; take this seriously.

“That was when they suspended the Constitution. They said it would be temporary. There wasn't even any rioting in the streets. People stayed home at night, watching television, looking for some direction. There wasn't even an enemy you could put your finger on.” — Margaret Atwood, The Handmaid’s Tale

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Scorpion 4x10 Review: " Crime Every Mountain" (So Much for Boring and Uneventful) [Guest Contributor: Yasmine]

"Crime Every Mountain"

Original Airdate: November 27, 2017

In this episode of Scorpion, hilariously titled “Crime Every Mountain,” no one is having a good day at the garage. Tensions are high and everyone is stressed out because of Cabe’s approaching court date. Everyone is trying to deal with it in their own way while they all try to help with the mock trial. However, Walter’s way of dealing with it is anything but helpful, or healthy for that matter. He’s regressing to his old self and his old ways by pushing people away — especially Cabe, being harsh and antagonistic towards him to prevent himself from the pain of possibly losing him. Walter’s attitude only gets worse throughout the day, causing everyone to feel attacked and uncomfortable around him, not just Cabe.

Eventually, Paige has enough of his attitude and talks to him, in the way that only Paige can talk to Walter. She reminds him that instead of pushing him away, he should be savoring the possible last moments with him. Finally, Walter admits he cannot process the thought of losing Cabe. Paige shares something from her past, when her mother left, and tells him that pain is the price of love and urges him not to push Cabe away because if the worst happens he wouldn’t be able to forgive himself.

Walter’s attitude is not the only reason the mock trial is not going well. Cabe wants to take the stand but Sylvester does not think it’s a good idea. Cabe is not performing well in the mock version — especially not when Walter confronts him and is extremely hostile in his questioning. But in general, Cabe is not handling being questioned or the case against him well at all. And things only get worse as the day progresses.

While Happy, Toby, Paige and Walter head out on a job — for once something that is not about Team Scorpion trying to save the world — Sly and Cabe stay back to work on the trial. But their prep is cut short when the Collins tracking software Sly and Walter had secretly been working on, the C.L.A.M, gives them a lead. The software is an elaborate one that is more or less illegal in some of what it does, but it helps them track any activity that can be related to Collins. The clue they get has Sylvester excited, as it might lead them directly to him when they find out a pawn shop has just bought very advanced radio equipment that only someone like Collins could have, and another clue leads them to believe Collins may be taking his grandmother to a retirement home that same day.

But after a wild goose chase around the city, they realize that Collins had been stringing them along. And worse of all is, by the end of the day, they realize that Collins had deposited a large amount of money in a bank account under Cabe’s name, making it look like the Homeland Security agent had taken a bribe to help Collins escape, making Cabe’s legal situation that much worse.

In the meantime, the others had arrived to test Happy’s new winch, hoping to sell it to Search and Rescue in New Mexico, but their client never shows. Instead, a small plane crashes nearby, and the four find themselves trying to save its passengers — a father and daughter.

While the father makes it out of the crash unscathed, the daughter suffers a broken leg. Happy and Toby stay with the daughter, Jessie, to fix her leg while Walter and Paige go with the father to help him find his son, who he says had jumped out of the plane with a parachute just before they crashed. However, it does not take long for them to realize that it is all a scam. The “son” is actually three bags of cash that the father and daughter crime team need to pay to a drug cartel. Unable to carry the bags alone, the father enlists Paige and Walter — at gunpoint — to assist him while Jessie also holds Toby and Happy hostage in the plane. For once there is no actual case for the team to solve beyond trying to survive and outsmart these two criminals, which offers a nice change of pace for the show. It is fun to watch how each couple uses all their skills and their superior intellect to outsmart their captors.

And while they are way smarter than them, this doesn’t mean that they don’t manage to find themselves in uncomfortable situations. Paige and Walter manage to escape by throwing themselves off a cliff, but that only leads them to be caught in a cave in. Luckily for them, Happy and Toby have also managed to outwit Jessie and, using the walkie talkie that fell with them off the cliff, they make contact. While Toby goes off to rescue their holed-up friends, Happy stays back to set up the next step of the plan.

I have to admit, that next step was surprisingly dark for a show like Scorpion. When Jessie gets locked in the car and it starts to roll off with no brakes toward the edge of the cliff, I was really shocked. A part of me knew that nothing would happen to her — that the show wouldn’t have these four killing a teenager — I still felt a little uneasy that the risk was even taken by them.

Finally back at the garage, Happy voices the concern that had been bothering her all day.  As if the pressures and anxieties of trying to get pregnant are not enough, Happy and Toby had been made more so by a comment from Walter about their pasts, both having dabbled in some illegal things. Happy is worried that their child will end up being a criminal because that would be ingrained in their DNA, and during their ordeal while held hostage, Happy had gotten to talk to Jessie about how she’d so easily joined her father in the criminal life.

Happy opens up to Toby about her fears, and what he tells her to ease her concerns is probably one of the most beautiful things ever said on this show and the most perfect testimony to this family and how close they all are and how strong they are together – and I hope it is foreshadowing what will happen in Cabe’s storyline. Toby tells her, “Sweetheart, it's nature vs. nurture. Jessie was nurtured by a sociopath. Our children will be nurtured by you and me... We're gonna be great. I mean, all parents do suck, sometimes. But when we do, we got Super-Mom Paige to watch out for us. And Walter's already reading up on early-stage neurological development. Sly's gonna give that kid a daily sanitizer dip. And Cabe will put his foot up our ass if we so much as miss a violin recital. If anything, we got to worry about them screwing up our kid. We're gonna be fine.”

Once again, the doc knocks it out of the park with his husbanding skills. Who thought when we first met him that Toby was going to end up being such an understanding and attentive husband? I am not going to lie, the way the writers are writing this marriage and this relationship can serve as a lesson to any writers.

Finally, as the events of the day — especially what Collins had put them through — take their toll on him, Cabe breaks down in the most emotional, most vulnerable and the most raw moment we have ever seen. He finally opens up, expressing everything he has been holding in — his anger and frustration — and it so painful to watch him like this. And yet what Sly sees is something positive. He tells Cabe that this is what he has to bring to court. That this kind of brutal honesty is what the judge needs to see.

All this is leading up to a huge emotional showdown with Collins, and while I have faith in this family and their ability to support each other, I must confess that I am very worried about Cabe.

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Brooklyn Nine-Nine 5x08 Recap: “Return to Skyfire” (The Case of the Missing Manuscripts) [Contributor: Alisa Williams]

“Return to Skyfire”

Original Airdate: November 28, 2017

On this week’s Brooklyn Nine-Nine, Terry’s favorite author, DC Parlov, is back and in need of the team’s help. You may remember Parlov and his 12-book series Skyfire Cycle — which changed Terry’s life forever — from last season. If not, you can read all about it in my recap of that episode.

This time, Parlov is in town for LegendCon and his latest manuscript has been stolen. Even though he turned out to be a big jerk last year, Terry admits they’ve kept in touch over the months and Parlov is actually quite nice. Jake is also now a huge fan, having read all 12 books while he was in prison and declaring them the greatest books ever written.

They convince an extremely skeptical Rosa to come with them to LegendCon to track down leads. Their first stop is the “Diversity in Fantasy Writing” panel Parlov is on... along with four other white guys. While they stand in the back waiting, Terry admits to Jake and Rosa that he’s been writing a novel. Jake encourages Terry to show it to Parlov and get his feedback, but Terry’s afraid it isn’t any good and doesn’t want to be embarrassed. Of course, as soon as Parlov approaches, Jake tells him about Terry’s book. Parlov says he’d love to read it, but first he has to show them why he called them in.

Parlov’s laptop, which contained the manuscript for the 13th book in the Skyfire series, was stolen and the thief left a ransom note demanding $500,000. If the ransom’s not paid, the book will be leaked online. To show they’re serious, the first five chapters have already been posted. Parlov tells them that those chapters have been downloaded 85,000 times.

Naturally, Jake’s first instinct is to go online and read the chapters to search for “clues,” but Rosa steers him back on course. Parlov tells them he knows who stole the book — it was Landon Lawson, a fellow panelist who has a book coming out the same time Parlov does. (Terry informs the team that Lawson’s Shadowbringer saga is garbage.) Parlov and Lawson have a bet on whose book will sell better, and if Skyfire is leaked online, his sales are sure to drop. Even worse, it will be the end of the Skyfire series, Parlov tells them. That lights a fire for Jake and Terry who immediately speed off to interrogate Lawson.

But things won’t be simple. When they arrive at Lawson’s hotel room he informs them that his manuscript has been stolen and he knows who the culprit is: DC Parlov. It turns out both Parlov and Lawson received identical ransom notes. This seems to indicate neither of them is the culprit, but they can’t think of any enemies they have besides each other.

Back at the precinct, Holt, Amy, and Boyle are super excited about a forensic sciences course being hosted by the precinct. It’s being taught by Dr. Ronald Yee (played by the hilarious Reggie Lee from Grimm), who revolutionized the field of forensic entomology. Boyle tells Holt and Amy that he’d like to sign up but they’re hesitant. Apparently, Boyle has a tendency of derailing presentations with personal stories and this particular presentation is extremely important. If the precinct does well with Yee’s course, they will receive board certification, making them eligible to receive a grant to open a field lab, so a lot is riding on this. Boyle promises he’ll behave and Holt and Amy agree he can sign up. Unfortunately, as soon as Yee arrives, the Boyle derailing begins.

The next day, they’re learning about plaster casting. Yee informs them that one person from each group will have a plaster model made of his or her head. They immediately vote for Boyle to be that person since he won’t be able to speak while the plaster is on and they’ll have a few minutes of peace.

In their eagerness to silence Boyle, they overlook one crucial step in creating the plaster cast. They were supposed to lubricate his face with Vaseline first so that the cast can be easily removed. When it comes time to remove it they realize their mistake and ask Yee (hypothetically, of course) what would happen if a person’s face wasn’t properly lubricated. Yee tells them that the plaster becomes impossible to remove without tearing the person’s skin right off, and they would have to instead wait five days for the plaster to slough off naturally. He then relays a story about the time a lab tech did that and was fired for his incompetence. Holt and Amy panic. They lead a plaster-headed Boyle into a supply closet where they inform him Hitchcock and Scully will babysit him and he’ll be out of view until the class is over, since if Yee sees him they’ll lose their chance at certification.

Boyle seems pretty upset about it but honestly it’s hard to tell because his only means of communication are the two straws up his nostrils allowing him to breathe and the incoherent mumbling he’s able to produce. Amy’s worried, but Holt draws a smiley face on the plaster to ease her mind, and they had back to class.

Meanwhile, Terry and Jake have stayed up all night working the case and are eager to fill Rosa in on what they’ve uncovered. It turns out Parlov and Lawson do share a common enemy: a fellow writer named Miles Moorgil. It seems they both slept with his wife, so he has some valid reasons for wanting revenge. They decide to head back out and talk to Moorgil, but before they do Jake quietly confides in Rosa that he read Terry’s book last night and it was awful. Now he’s worried Parlov will tear it apart and crush Terry’s hopes and dreams. Terry’s been riding high since Parlov agreed to read it and is already convinced a publisher will call any minute. Jake’s not sure what to do.

While Jake wrestles with that decision, he and Terry confront Moorgil. It turns out that Moorgil had no idea his wife had slept with either Parlov or Lawson until Jake mentioned it. A big fight ensues, complete with the Moorgils’ young son asking Jake and Terry repeatedly if his parents are getting divorced. Jake things the child looks suspiciously like Parlov and they extricate themselves from the room as quickly as possible.

As they leave, Jake makes an off-handed reference to something from Terry’s book and Terry realizes Jake read it and hadn’t said anything. Terry deduces that Jake hated it and Jake can’t manage to lie convincingly. Terry’s upset but they have to go meet Rosa. With no other leads, Lawson and Parlov have decided to pay the ransoms. They’re supposed to leave the money behind a potted plant in the lobby.

Terry tells Parlov and Lawson that if they see anyone take the bag of cash, they’ll swoop in and intercept him/her. Jake and Terry will be disguised as characters from Skyfire, naturally. Rosa says that won’t work for her because she doesn’t own a nerd costume. Terry tells her that’s no problem because she naturally dresses like the female bounty hunter in every steampunk novel ever written. Sure enough, in the lobby they encounter several Rosa lookalikes, much to her disgust.

Over at the precinct, Dr. Yee has become suspicious about Boyle’s absence. Holt and Amy manage to convince him that after they successfully removed Boyle’s plaster face cast, he then had to leave to go save some kidnapped children. Yee buys it, but just then Scully and Hitchcock come in and pull Holt and Amy away. It turns out that while they were both in the bathroom, Boyle wandered off and they have no idea where he is.

They look everywhere but can’t find him. Just then, they hear a huge crash and run out of the breakroom to find a very confused and scared Boyle at the bottom of the stairs. His plaster cast has cracked slightly so now he can at least speak to them, but the rest of his face and head is still covered. He tells them he was trying to help by going to the showers in the hopes of steaming the mask off, but he got turned around and ended up falling down the stairs. Holt and Amy feel terrible for the way they treated him and tell him the certification isn’t as important as he is.

They lead Boyle back to the presentation and come clean to Yee about the fact they failed to listen to his instructions about applying lubricant. Holt says he hopes his honesty will mean that certification is still on the table but Yee says no, they have definitely failed. Holt understands and with nothing left to lose, allows Boyle to derail the rest of the presentation with a personal story involving a Boyle cousin who has a genetic disorder called “bird mouth.”

Back at LegendCon, things are not going very well. Terry, Rosa, and Jake observe someone dressed as the Skyfire character Ka’lar — who Jake also happens to be dressed as — grab the ransom, but when they round the corner to intercept him/her, there are dozens of Ka’lars. It turns out a Ka’lar costume contest just ended, which is why the person waited until now to steal the bag. Terry thinks he spots him and Jake tells him to take him down, but then Terry tackles Jake, and it’s obvious he had eyes on the wrong Ka’lar after all.

Lawson is super angry at them for losing him $500,000 and storms off in a huff. Parlov is less concerned, saying his insurance will cover it and he’ll get it all back. More importantly, while he was waiting he had the chance to read Terry’s manuscript. Parlov says he absolutely loved it and sent it along to his publishers. Terry is so excited he runs off to call his wife. After Terry and Parlov leave, Jake tells Rosa that Parlov’s lying and he thinks it’s because Parlov and Lawson conspired to steal their own manuscripts and are now just trying to butter Terry up so he doesn’t realize it was them.

Jake thinks they leaked their first few chapters to generate excitement over the books, then staged the ransom to raise the hype even more. Parlov has been sending Terry presents and winning him over for a year now, and knew he’d be easy to manipulate. When Jake and Rosa go to break it to Terry, he’s already figured it out. Not only that, but he already got a warrant for Parlov’s browser history, found the evidence, arrested Parlov and Lawson, and even got a confession.

Jake then tells Terry not to give up on his dream of being a writer. Just because his first novel was awful and everyone hated it doesn’t mean that he can’t get better if he works at it. And now that Jake and Terry have made up, they head off to the evidence room to read the 13th Skyfire novel on Parlov’s confiscated laptop.

Bullets on the Bulletin Board:

• “I know you think it’s dumb but Skyfire is actually very smart and dark and adult. It’s not for nerds at all. Oh! On our way there, should we sing the Elvish hunting song?”
• “What is it that you do in your free time that is soooo cool?” “Fix up old cars and sell them to celebrities. That’s why I’m friends with Tom Hardy.” “Right, so, we agree that we’re all equally cool.”
• “I’m not sure Barbra Streisand counts as a rock star, sir.” “She sings in English. That’s rock music.”
• “Send it over to me and I’m going to stay up all night reading it.” “It’s only 150 pages.” “I’m going to stay up all the next three nights reading it.”
• “What? Terry, no! I didn’t hate it. I liked tons of parts.” “Name one. Name one part you liked, Jake.” “The map?” “I didn’t draw that! It was a map of the Chesapeake Bay with the name slightly changed.” “Sarge, I’m sorry! I didn’t just like the map. I also liked... the spaces between the words!”
• “Why would you leave that windowless supply closet we locked you in? ... Ah, yes. Hearing it, I understand why.”
• “I started reading it because the character looks like me. I kept reading it because it’s SO GOOD.” “Rosa! You did get hooked, you big nerd!” “This heroine is my heroin.”

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DCTV Crossover Roundtable: "Crisis on Earth-X, Parts 1-4" (How Many People Are in This Again?) [Contributors: Deb and Marilyn]

“Crisis on Earth-X, Parts 1-4”

Original Airdates: November 27 and 28, 2017

Since this crossover was such a massive event — practically a four-hour movie, when you think about it — we've broken the review down by show, rather than trying to shove all of this “crisis” into one linear recap. Based on the shows, we're quickly describing how characters might be affected in the future and their biggest contributions to the plot.

SUPERGIRL

Alex and Kara are in a mutual love life funk, so they make a sudden decision to skip over to another Earth, forget about life for a while, and attend Barry and Iris’s wedding. They chit-chat with their pals, dine on fancy rehearsal dinner food, listen to some lovely speeches, and at the end of the evening, Alex gets drunk and has a one-night stand with Sara from Legends of Tomorrow. Oops!

Alex sort of freaks out about it, but I think Sara is probably the best one-night stand option for her. She’s cool, all about the no-strings-attached, and lives on a different Earth. Perfect rebound, Alex.

During Barry and Iris’s wedding, Kara is the one singing Iris down the aisle, which is a pretty charming reference to the musical episode from last season. Unfortunately, once Kara’s song is finished, Nazis attack the ceremony. Yes. Nazis. That’s a thing that is happening. Since the church is full of superheroes, everyone does an admirable job fighting them off, but two definite leaders — a masked archer and a flying blonde woman — get away.

These two are, of course, doppelgängers of Oliver and Kara, who are a married couple and leaders in Earth-X’s Nazi government. (We’ll call them Oliver-X and Overgirl, for future reference.)

The whole reason why they attacked Earth-X is because they knew, through Earth-1’s Eobard Thawne (who joined Earth-X’s team because he’s evil and I guess he likes being in evil clubs), that it was the Westallen wedding and Supergirl was going to be there. They needed Supergirl because the Earth-X version — Overgirl — has radiation poisoning and needs a heart transplant. Supergirl hearts? Rather difficult to come by, I imagine. But by the end of the crossover, Overgirl explodes. Womp womp!

Kara and Alex learn to put their problems into a little perspective and that everything has a chance of turning out okay, as long as they have each other. It’s a pretty nice lesson for the both of them, but I think they managed to get out of “Crisis on Earth-X” without a whole lot of long-term change... compared to the other shows’ characters.

ARROW

The major players from Arrow in “Crisis on Earth-X” were Oliver and Felicity and their arc had a lot to do with the state of their relationship. From the scene at the nail shop with Iris and the other girls, to the tux fitting with Oliver and Barry, through the rehearsal dinner and even under the threat of evil doppelgängers from another Earth, the question was: What’s next for Oliver and Felicity’s relationship? Both Iris and Barry both nudge the two toward one another, with Barry outright telling Oliver to “put a ring on her.”

The problem is that Felicity has some residual issues leftover from their last engagement. She tells Oliver it’s because she was shot five minutes after he proposed. But later, she admits to Iris that her problem is really that she’s afraid to rock the boat with Oliver. Things are good for them right now — really good. The last time they were going to get married, that was the beginning of the end for them. She doesn’t want to lose him again.

Oliver agrees, rather reluctantly, to respect Felicity’s wishes not to get married. But then the two are separated: Oliver on Earth-X with a load of other heroes, having to deal with all the Nazi nonsense there. Felicity is in S.T.A.R. Labs with Iris when Earth-X’s “Oliver” comes with his soldiers and Thawne, attempting to kill Kara to save Overgirl’s life. Iris and Felicity fight the good fight (and call in the Legends) as long as they can, and Oliver does the same over on Earth-X. One of the most poignant moments of the crossover came when Oliver posed as Oliver-X to gain access to a gate that could return them to Earth-1, and encountered Earth-X’s Felicity. She was a prisoner of the concentration camp, pulled out for giving starving children food. Oliver could no more kill her than he could his own Felicity.

Oliver and Felicity reunite back on Earth-1, just happy to be together now — married or not. But when Felicity watches Barry and Iris pour their hearts out to one another with some seriously swoon-worthy vows during their impromptu wedding, she changes her mind and asks Dig to marry her and Oliver as well. He’s only too happy to oblige and we end with both couples getting hitched on the spot.

THE FLASH

The biggest long-term development for Team Flash is what set the whole crossover off in the first place: the marriage of Barry Allen and Iris West. Their nuptials are what brings everyone together, as all the hero teams do last-second RSVPs and then show up to a rehearsal dinner that definitely should not have been adequately prepared for the final number of guests. Seriously, all Barry and Iris’s super-friends are rude with those super-late RSVPs.

Unfortunately, the Westallen wedding is interrupted by the main plot and The Flash’s favorite couple spends most of the crossover separated. Iris pairs up with Felicity as the overlooked good guys left in Earth-1’s S.T.A.R Labs, making them the only ones capable of thwarting Oliver-X and Overgirl’s evil plans to steal Supergirl’s heart. Barry is transported to Earth-X along with Oliver, Alex, Sara, Professor Stein, and Jax, and they have to fight their way to the portal that can get them home. Once home, everyone has a role to play in the final battle against Oliver-X, Overgirl, and Eobard Thawne. Barry’s critical role is to return to his idiot ways, apparently, because he lets Eobard Thawne go rather than kill him. You couldn’t have speed-scrambled his legs a bit, Barry? Thrown him in jail? Literally anything else?

When all’s said and done, all the heroes go their separate ways and Barry and Iris get a last-minute wedding officiated by none other than John Diggle, who wasn’t invited to the original wedding for some reason that probably has to do with the season and a half of Arrow I haven’t watched. Barry and Iris are adorable and their vows are beautiful and it would have been nice if they got to get married in front of their friends and family, rather than just Oliver and Felicity, but comic book plots, man.

LEGENDS OF TOMORROW

Sara, Mick, Stein, and Jax all head to Barry and Iris’ wedding while the remaining Legends continue cavorting around in time and space. Sara has a one-night stand with Alex before the wedding and Mick, well, Mick is just there for the food. And the beer. The real emotional crux came from Jax and Stein, who are still working on how to separate Firestorm. They finally have an answer — thanks to some help from S.T.A.R. Labs — and Stein plans to take the formula that will finally separate them after the wedding. Jax is feeling less certain about the impending event: What will become of him when he’s no longer part of Firestorm? Can he even continue being a Legend?

There’s an emotional moment where Jax finally admits his concerns to Stein and the older man tries to reassure Jax and let him know that he is important. In fact, Stein thinks of him as a son. It’s truly touching, amidst all the horror of the Nazis.

The rest of the Legends show up when Felicity and Iris call them in. Ray appears at the perfect moment, saving Kara’s life from Eobard’s scalpel. The moment the rest of the Legends arrive is one of the most joyful of the crossover, in my opinion. It’s wonderful to see all my faves show up to help save the day.

The joy is undercut by grief when Stein is shot by Nazis on Earth-X. He uses the last of his strength to open the gate back to Earth-1 and Jax is able to merge with him, keeping him alive. But eventually, Jax starts to suffer from the effects of the shooting as well. The reality is that they will both die unless Firestorm separates.

Stein wants to take the formula and save Jax’s life which leads one of the saddest scenes I’ve ever seen in the Arrowverse. Stein tells Jax how he loves him as a son and will gladly sacrifice his life so that Jax can have a life filled with love, just like he has. After their tearful goodbye, Stein dies. The Legends are distraught, but determined to fight and repel the Nazis from Earth-1 in his honor. Stein would have been proud. After the battle, the team and the rest of the heroes pay their respects at an emotional funeral for Stein and it’s a reminder that things on board the Waverider are changed now, forever.

OUR THOUGHTS

DEB

THE GOOD: The reason why the DCTV episode reviews for this event have been condensed into one large review is also the best thing about this crossover, and that is the near-seamless integration of all the shows. Previous crossovers have attempted delineation between shows, either by having each episode mostly self-contained (see: the Invasion! plot, in which episodes had a clear beginning, middle, and end, even though they bled into each other) or going back to basics and simply having some characters hang out with some other characters for an hour or two. But as the Arrowverse has gotten bigger and the writers have gotten more adept at writing for the multiverse, they’ve managed to figure out a way to blend every show together in a genuine event that reflects the comic book specials on which these crossovers are based.

The characters always, always work well together and they’re a joy to watch interacting on screen, so that’s always a highlight. Barry offering up some smart relationship advice to Oliver (“People like us are always going to be getting into trouble. Having someone we love by our side just makes getting out of that trouble that much easier.”) or Felicity and Iris bravely stepping up to protect Supergirl, of all people, from threats — I think these little moments, rather than big fight scenes, make the crossovers worthwhile. Since the writers have been good about progressing these characters’ friendships, I assume it’s only going to get better as time goes on.

In addition to great character moments and perfect cross-show integration, there was also some snazzy graphics (the introductions of each show/team at the beginning of “Crisis on Earth-X” was probably one of my favorite things the Arrowverse has done) and, of course, cool action scenes.

THE BAD: Uh... Earth-X is run by Nazis. Which is an extremely problematic alternate universe for this show to explore, even considering comic books’ long history of World War II-era storylines. Opening an episode of a stupid comic book show with a swastika flag? Uncomfortable, to say the least, and that level of discomfort doesn’t exactly diminish as the crossover sends a chunk of our heroes to Earth-X itself, to be held captive in a concentration camp.

The imagery the show (and the comic it’s based on, we’re not letting them off the hook) exploits for shock value is nauseating and unnecessary. There was nothing stopping them from making this big crossover about some evil Earth-N, where the world/America is ruled by a totalitarian regime, without pulling Nazis into the mix and unearthing painful associations — especially since the “Nazi” factor of the crossover event is not utilized in any meaningful way. Like I said: it’s done for shock. I would say that it was also done as an easy way to differentiate good from evil, but they kind of fail at that by making the Nazi alternatives to Oliver and Kara married. Comic books usually treat stories like these as black and white, but genuine love adds a moral gray area that we really do not need when we’re dealing with a Nazi storyline.

So the biggest — maybe the only — fault of this crossover is its framing device. Otherwise, this would have been the best crossover in the history of the Arrowverse, hands down.

MARILYN

THE BAD: I agree with Deb — the worst thing about the crossover is the Nazis. I understand that it’s a comic book story. As satisfying as it is to see our heroes beating the crap out of Nazis, the way the subject is introduced and then shown to us throughout the crossover is crass, at best. They could have done nearly the same exact story but with a fictional evil regime. The same themes would be in place without real-world associations.

Nazis aside, I didn’t care for the Overgirl/Oliver-X romance, and not just because I’m a faithful Olicity shipper. It felt very disturbing and pointed — like they were trying to show a more “sensitive” side to actual Nazis. I think there were ways to get the lessons that the characters needed to learn across without that nonsense.

THE GOOD: The relationships! I loved seeing the most important relationships from each of the four shows highlighted and explored. There was real character development taking place and because of that, it felt like there were genuine stakes to the events in the crossover. This wasn’t just a one-off event, as the crossovers often are, but something that would have repercussions and effects felt throughout the rest of the seasons of each show.

I also liked how connected “Crisis on Earth-X” was. It truly felt like one bit movie, spread across two nights. It didn’t even really matter that I’m not very familiar with Supergirl or The Flash; I was able to understand and appreciate what was happening with those characters regardless. It all felt very cohesive and the cast truly did feel like one big family. I generally don’t care for the crossovers; but this time, I found myself really enjoying it as I watched. Shoot, if all crossovers could be like this one, I could maybe find myself looking forward to the next one!

What did you all think of “Crisis on Earth-X”? Sound off in the comments below!

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Blindspot 3x05 Review: "This Profound Legacy" (Kurt Knew) [Contributor: Jen]

"This Profound Legacy"

Original Airdate: December 1, 2017

Hello, Blindspotters! I am back. I am way behind on Blindspot reviews (sorry about that), so let's not waste any time and get right to it. Blindspot dropped yet another bombshell on Jeller in "This Profound Legacy."

CASE OF THE WEEK

The backbone tattoo is a series of numbers and letters tattooed along Jane's spine. The tattoo correlates to a tracking number for a box of evidence that is being transferred. How on earth would Roman know the tracking number of an evidence transfer months before it takes place? Easy — this tracking number is 20 years old. It's been sitting in storage and has now just been released.

What's in the box is not only disturbing, but about as close to real life as Blindspot gets. It's an untested rape kit. Unfortunately, this is a big problem in law enforcement. Budgets require prioritization — narcotics and homicide comes first, which means there are hundreds of rape kits left untested. It's a major bottleneck in the system. Hundreds of thousands of kits remain untested and DNA, which could lead to arrests and prevent future assaults, remains locked away. It's beyond frustrating and difficult not to be #TeamRoman on this point.

This particular rape kit belongs to a woman named Yasmine who was assaulted by the king of Kazahrusian. Blindspot really needs to work on their fake country names. King Ivan was a brutal dictator and died this past year without an heir. Or did he? Yasmine conceived a son named Vanya nine months after the rape. King Ivan decided to get one last dig into his younger brother, Cyrus, and confessed on his deathbed that he has an heir after all. So, now King Cyrus is trying to kill Vanya to remove any potential threat to his reign.

Luckily, Kurt and Jane find Yasmine and Vanya hiding in a hotel room and bring them to a hospital before Yasmine bleeds out from a gunshot wound. Eventually, the Kazahrusians find them at the hospital and it leads to pretty epic gunfire battle. Of course, Kurt and Jane save the day because they are Kurt and Jane. King Cyrus is ultimately hanged by the Kazahrusian elites (whoever they are) and demand Vanya come home to rule. Vanya is young, idealistic, and noble and decides he has to return to Kazahrus by asking, "What if I can make things better for these people? Don't I have to try?"

The plot was more than a little ridiculous, and don't even get me started on the fake country names, but I still found myself slightly choked up when Vanya decided to leave everything he's ever known behind to help a country full of strangers.

TEAM BLINDSPOT

Patterson believes someone at the FBI is covering up Stuart's murder, so when his phone inexplicably washes up on shore Patterson and Zapata decide to use it to flush out the betrayer. The phone is mush, but they bluff instead and pretend they were able to obtain valuable information from it.

Someone logs in and erases the last fifty uploads to the server, including Patterson's bogus phone data. Who? Reade.

Now, if you're going: "No way," then Zapata is your spirit animal. Granted, Reade told Patterson she wouldn't get anything off the phone and he has been sketch about his after hours meetings with high-profile officials. But that's a far cry from cover-up and murder.

Luckily, Blindspot knows our tolerance for "Reade is the mole" is only going to last for so long. We're still burnt out from Borden. Patterson figures out that someone is using Reade's login credentials and the key strokes match Eleanor Hirst. I have no idea if you can identify someone based off their key strokes, but if Patterson says you can then... sure.

Patterson and Zapata try to bring their discovery to Reade who refuses to believe them. This man really needs to watch Blindspot. THERE'S ALWAYS A MOLE, READE. THAT'S THE SHOW! He waxes poetic about real evidence and sends Patterson and Zapata on their way. Sigh. This is the second rule of Blindspot that Reade has ignored:

1. Patterson knows all.
2. There's always a mole.
3. Jeller is the heart and soul of everything Blindspot.

Them's the rules. I'm this close to kicking you off the team, Reade! I'm excited to see how Mary Stuart Masterson plays the bad guy, even if the Director of the FBI isn't exactly an inspired choice. She's the newest team member and in a position of power. In the immortal words of Rachel Green, "She lifts right out!"

Sure, the team is attached to her, but that primarily happened over the time jump. So, I'm not terribly invested in her relationships with anyone on Team Blindspot. This makes Reade's refusal to believe Patterson and Zapata even more ridiculous, but I'll give him a pass. At least he's not doing drugs this time.

KURT AND JANE

KURT KNEW. HOLY FREAKING CRAP. HE KNEW!

Kurt knew Jane has a daughter. That's what Berlin is. While Kurt was racing around the country handing out pictures of Jane like she was a lost puppy, he casually bumps into a young woman named Avery who speaks fluent German. She recognizes the photo in Kurt's hand because she is also looking for Jane.

Kurt: How do you know Jane? 

Avery: She's my mother.

SAY WHAAAAT? I'm not going to sugar coat this for you friends. This is bad. We're not at "Kurt is cheating on Jane" bad, but I'm not grading on a curve. So let's run down the list of all the ways Kurt Weller has screwed up:

1. He knows Jane has a daughter and didn't tell her.
2. Kurt has met Jane's daughter and didn't tell her.
3. After Jane found out she has a daughter, Kurt didn't tell her he already knew (re: see 1 and 2).

Are we seeing a pattern here? Man, just when I thought we were past lying. Darn you, Weller! This will delay my Jeller babies for sure. I'm sure Kurt has an honorable reason for not telling Jane about Avery, because he's Kurt Weller. Honor is his middle name. My money is on Kurt being afraid he'd spook Jane again, after he found her, and she'd run off to the Himalayas or something.

A valid fear, of course, but it's been several months now. Kurt needed to cough up the information. Full stop. It doesn't mean he doesn't love Jane — quite the opposite. I think Kurt would do just about anything to save Jane from more pain, but that's exactly the problem.

Kurt: I want to be there for her but I don't know how. 

Patterson: Just listen to her and don't try to fix it. 

Kurt: That's the problem. I can't fix it.

This is a very typical male response. Women mostly just want someone to listen to us, whereas men feel the need to fix the problem. My bet is that Kurt is approaching Avery as a problem to be fixed or something he can save Jane from. But that's not his call to make. Furthermore, sometimes keeping the ones we love from pain only exacerbates it more. We seldom prevent pain entirely. So Kurt has simply compounded a problem that was already difficult to being with.

And yes, this is difficult. Jane has absolutely no idea what to believe. At first she thinks Roman is just messing with her and argues against all the evidence Patterson comes up with. This is pretty smart on Jane's part. She obviously watches Blindspot (take notes Reade) and is trying to figure out how this is one big lie.

It's not until Roman calls and reminds Jane he has no reason to hide this from her. He wants to cause Jane pain. The truth is painful enough all by itself. Roman wants Jane to know this. He wants her to feel the grief that comes with the knowledge that she has a child. A child Jane doesn't know and, now, barely remembers. A child who was taken from her or... a child she gave away.

Jane immediately blames herself, which plays right into Roman's plan. This is why he told her. Jane doesn't believe Sheppard took Avery from her. Jane believes she let Avery go. Seeing Yasmine stand by her son Vanya — a child conceived from sexual assault — only twists in the guilt knife further. So much so that Jane believes her daughter is better off without her.

Jane doesn't know the full story yet. She only has a few pieces of the puzzles, but she often believes the worst about herself. That self-hatred is what is driving Jane's belief that she just let her daughter go. But in reality, she doesn't know what truly happened.

"He's 20 years old and he doesn't want this," is a point Kurt lovingly points out when he tells Jane she was just a child herself.  This is a part of life though. The decisions we make even as teenagers can have ramifications for the rest of our lives. However, Jane needs to leave some room for being manipulated by Sheppard because that's been the story of her entire life. Why would Avery be any different?

I'd also like to point out that giving a child up for adoption is a profound act of selfless love. If Jane chose to give her baby up for adoption it doesn't mean she loves her daughter any less than Kurt loves Bethany. She may have simply recognized that raising her daughter with her loony bin of a mother may not be in the best interest of the baby. I reject the concept that adoption equals abandonment. More often that not, the birth parent has given their child a chance at a better life.

Or maybe the baby was taken by Sheppard or Jane was manipulated. The point is that we don't know. And neither does Jane. She should try to see it through Kurt's eyes rather than believing the worst about herself.

Kurt needs to learn he is the one truth in Jane's world of manipulation. Jane depends on his honestly and trustworthiness. That's what gets her through the madness. If that foundation begins to crack, then yes, I would say Jeller has a difficult road ahead of them. Not insurmountable, but difficult. But then again, that's been Roman's plan all along.

Stray Thoughts:

• Avery's father is Jane's high-school sweetheart. I accept that Jane had a life before Kurt Weller, but any acknowledgement of past lovers makes me scream internally.
• "How could I forget I had a child?" You zipped your memory, Jane. You were supposed to forget. You aren't freaking superwoman.
• Okay Zapata and Reade's competition of Patterson's app is the cutest ever.
• "You used to be a cop. We get it." That was just mean, Reade. Stop being such a jerk to Zapata.

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