From Cinnamon Roll to Problematic Fav: A Laura Hollis Appreciation Post [Contributor: Melanie]

The second season of Carmilla has really been full of standout moments for Laura Hollis, and not necessarily in the most flattering way. But that doesn’t mean they weren’t good, amazing to watch scenes. And hey — she’s a growing girl and that ain’t always easy, especially when your first year at school is plagued with kidnappings, virgin sacrifices, and Lovecraftian monsters. That's not even including the amoral girlfriend, the confusing lines of loyalty, and a heck of a lot of wolves in sheep’s clothing. So here’s some real talk: the saga of how Laura Hollis went from cinnamon roll to problematic "fav" and it how crazy entertaining it was to watch that character evolution.

Back in season one, Laura was an adorable, gay-as-the-day-is-long, cookie addict with a lot of chutzpah and uncontrolled flaying. In the second season, she still is all those things, just with a little more sadface. She’s an awesome break from the typical leads you would encounter in supernatural romance — you know, the ones who end up being some kind of Bella Swan reject pretending that they’re Buffy. Laura is a modern day everywoman: she’s a frantic college student, she reads fanfiction, she eats exorbitant amounts of junk food, her pop culture vocabulary stretches from Veronica Mars to Dragonball Z. She’s quite possibly the most realistic depiction of a young adult there’s been in modern media in quite a while.

And while Laura spent most of season one on a bit of linear track with no real flaws or non-environmental issues (Carmilla was doing a lot of the heavy lifting when it came to character development), this season has widened Laura’s range. That, in turn, has lead to some fun consequences (definitions of "fun" may vary). Laura’s made all the wrong decisions this year. This character act has been one entertaining trainwreck filled with emotional breakdowns, shouting matches, and tears. And while she’s gotten her fair share of hate on Twitter and Tumblr, all of Laura's decisions have served to give depth to her character. Because, as many fans pointed out multiple times, we don’t know a thing about Laura.

The season finale was probably the greatest showcase of what a complicated character Laura really is underneath all that sugar and webcam mugging. After an eleventh hour decision to save Carmilla leads to some shock, catatonia, and epic levels of guilt, Laura shuffles through her conflicting emotions. And while not much is solved, all of the plot builds a pretty intense portrait of what is contained within Laura’s head. She knows now, too, all of the ways in which she massively messed up. Yet, as Carmilla pointed out, it’ll be okay. One thing I think that we can all definitely appreciate is that the writers of Carmilla delivered some real, tangible consequences and some solid character growth in Laura. Actress Elise Bauman played this character with some amazing honesty, calling Laura’s arc this season “a gift” and noting in a Periscope interview:

“My favorite thing about Laura is that she’s got a lot going on underneath what she presents to people... I kept in mind all the time that Laura feels responsible. She feels like it was her fault and that she needs to make amends for everything that’s going wrong with the school and that, to me, justified everything that she was doing... and that’s where she goes astray a little bit.”

So if you loved Laura Hollis for her quirks and cringed at her choices, that’s okay. She’s a real, breathing character now with a lot of stuff to work out, not just in the department of failed relationships, but within herself. Like all good coming-of-age stories, she’s asking questions that may change how she fundamentally sees herself. But that is necessary. Ultimately, Laura’s relatable, because even in the most supernatural of situations, her choices are intensely human. Few things in life are more awesome than seeing a female lead being treated by the writers and actors as a character study and not just some eye candy. So I applaud you Laura Hollis (and her creators Jordan Hall and Ellen Simpson) for being real, gritty, and still entirely sympathetic.

Check out the first two seasons of Carmilla on the VerveGirl TV YouTube channel and Season 0 on the U By Kotex YouTube Channel! 

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American Horror Story 5x07 "Flicker" (Did Someone Say Exposition?) [Contributor: Melanie]

"Flicker"

Original Airdate: November 18, 2015

It’s hard for me to keep nitpicking the same eight things over again as American Horror Story continues shamelessly pretending it’s The Shining, trying to reinvent the vampire genre, and its plethora of problematic portrayals. So with that in mind, this week I thought I’d give a little praise to the exposition in this episode, which gave us more information about the Countess after weeks of enduring a lot of self-pitying scenes with Lowe. Though nothing super shocking was revealed about Elizabeth’s past (we all guessed that she was March’s wife, right?), and the use of F.W. Murnau was odd, it was still nice to see Gaga get a chance to shine a little more and play a wider spectrum. It was also nice to see some real care taken into fleshing out her character.

I will say, while the backstory was interesting, Finn Wittrock’s portrayal of Elizabeth’s old lover was pretty awkward and unbelievable, especially next to Evan Peters who has been doing a surprisingly good job with March’s eccentricities. And while the backstory tries to ignite familiarity by using pieces from Dracula’s story (the Carpathian Mountains, thrall, etc.) it never commits to any one aspect and the result is some kind of messy slew of vampire folklore. And even with new information on Elizabeth’s sires, nothing interesting was gleamed from the mythology Murphy’s writing is trying to create. Ultimately, it all feels watered down and, like Asylum, like it’s trying to stretch itself in too many directions instead of focusing in and expanding the already present elements.

But, here’s what happened in the episode...

The episode begins with the hotel’s renovations in full swing. Drake informs his son he plans to stay at the hotel with Elizabeth “forever” before a foreman informs him that a 1-inch thick steel wall is lining the hallway. They send two men to tear it down, but those men are attacked and killed by two of the ghoulish creatures. Lowe is in the West L.A. Health Center for evaluation, as he believes he’s having a mental breakdown after he attacked his partner. But he’s still trying to investigate the Ten Commandments Killer, despite being on his own and the illegality of the investigation. Alex tries to convince him to go to another location for treatment but he claims he saw the name of this hospital on the case file and intends to stay.

Elizabeth and Iris converse about the tears in the walls and the Countess seems genuinely scared. Another creature then attacks a guest at the hotel as she answers her door. In a flashback to 1925, we see Elizabeth meeting Rudolph Valentino (played by Finn Wittrock) for dinner and dancing before Valentino’s wife finds them. The couple is getting divorced, but his wife quickly reveals that story is PR, and joins in on their night. Later, March hosts an opening night party at the hotel and Elizabeth learns her lover has died. Just before she can jump out a window, March pulls her in and says he will never let her go, hinting to the audience that they’re married. Later she begins delivering roses to the grave of Valentino before learning from his wife Natacha that Valentino is actually still alive. He faked his death after being offered immortal life from F.W. Murnau, the director of Nosferatu (yeah, it’s as weird as it sounds). Valentino and his wife then turn Elizabeth while March watches nearby.

After hearing a guard in the criminally insane ward discuss a known killer in room 153, Lowe overpowers the guard and breaks in. Inside he finds Wren, who admits to helping the Ten Commandments Killer with the murders at the church and that she was present for other killings. Despite Wren showing no remorse for her actions, Lowe offers her absolution, seeing his daughter in her, and insisting she is not responsible for the killer’s mistakes. Really, he’s speaking to the parts of Scarlet he sees in her, and is trying to express that his daughter isn’t responsible for his actions. It is also revealed Wren is related to the killer, though she insists he is not her father, who abandoned her in 1986 outside the Hotel Cortez where Elizabeth turned her. She offers to take Lowe to the killer if he can get her out.

It is then revealed that Valentino and Natacha are the ghouls in the walls and that they return to normal after they feed. They have an argument that ends quickly when they hear guests, which means they have more to eat. March and Elizabeth then dine together (as they do once a month) and she informs him she plans on marrying again. He seems positive about the plan but suggests she murders Drake off property so he’s not trapped with them. She counters that she may have found love, but March insists the only person she ever loved was Valentino and reveals that he had locked him and Natacha up in the walls. Said couple, now returned to their normal states after feeding, walks out of the hotel. Back at the hospital, Lowe and Wren escape but when Lowe informs her he intends to kill the Ten Commandments Killer, she apologizes and runs into traffic, where she’s hit by a truck.

Check back here for more recaps every week!

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Jenn's Pick: Top 10 TV Characters I'm Thankful For in 2015

This Thanksgiving marks the third year in a row that I have done this fun little series about television characters that I am thankful for. (Read my 2013 and 2014 lists, if you would like!) And it may seem silly and a bit absurd to most people (especially to those who don't write about television for a living... or, in my case, a side-project), that anyone would take the time to write a post about fictional characters. But in my opinion, television has become a vast and wonderful landscape over the past few years, promoting diversity and increasingly giving women more complex, nuanced roles. As multiple film actors stated at Comic-Con this year, television is the place to be for amazing roles.

So it stands to reason, then, that we SHOULD celebrate the fantastic characters that writers and producers and the actors who portray them have worked so tirelessly to bring to life. Each year, I try to shake up my list of actors and actresses. So if you don't, say, see Emily Bett Rickards' alter ego Felicity Smoak on here, it's because I spent last year discusisng her at length. I've tried to pick from an array of television series and genres, because I watch a lot of television, and hope that you find my picks to be interesting and potentially reflective of your own, as well!

So throw your turkey in the dryer, put it on permanent press, and let's kick this thing off!

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Scream Queens 1x09 "Ghost Stories" (Anyone Up For a Campfire Story?) [Contributor: Melanie]

"Ghost Stories"

Original Airdate: November 17, 2015

So last week my computer decided to plot my downfall and, as you probably noticed, I couldn’t get my Scream Queens recap up. So to sum up last week real quick: Munsch reveals a ton of information about the night the baby in the bathtub was born, but nobody present that night knows the entire story to help keep them all safe; Grace learns her mother was the president of Kappa who let the girl in the tub die, and that there were two babies born that night; Gigi is revealed to be the woman who looked after the children while Westin showed a bit of a darker side; Chanel tried unsuccessfully to frame Zayday and Grace as the killers, while Boone plotted with the other killer to take out Gigi. It was an exposition-heavy episode, and therefore a little denser than is befitting the vapid nature of this show. But, at least we could see a tiny bit of the possible structure of this whole thing.

This week’s Scream Queens was, again, less irritating than previous episodes and actually had some truly purposeful comedic moments. The story as a whole is starting to make a lot more sense as more of the convoluted (and somehow midseason retconned) backstory comes to light. But the interesting thing about this week was the focus on urban legends as a theme throughout the episode. Earlier in the season, the show struggled to find real grounding in their episode themes (“Chainsaw” was a boring bust and the Halloween triplet episodes just sort of dragged). And while they didn’t say anything too profound about urban legends with this episode, it drew my attention to something that did.

Sidebar here for a shameless plug: The documentary Killer Legends, which can be found on Netflix, came to mind this week as Denise and Neckbrace shared an anthology of mostly recognizable (slightly Matrix-y) urban legends. They referenced the honking highway trucker legend, the man with a hook for a hand, and a few others of their own odd creation. Urban legends are not only a staple within the horror genre; they’re often a source for scary stories, as they proliferate across cultures into small communities. Joshua Zeman and Rachel Mills’ documentary about the real life root of four common urban tales is not only a must watch for anyone looking for some casual spooky entertainment, but fits in nicely as a companion piece to tonight’s episode. It also showcases how rich this topic is, and how Ryan Murphy barely skimmed the surface. "Ghost Stoires" had the potential to be a redeeming episode, and while it played on the trope fairly well, give Killer Legends a look for some fascinating and true-life horror.

With that in mind, on with the episode!

The episode opens with Boone out on campus (continually mistaken for Joaquin Phoenix), plotting with an unknown caller to kill Gigi. Chanel #3 spots Boone and assumes he’s a ghost come back to get revenge on her for refusing his request to pledge Kappa. Chanel calls the Chanels for a meeting (dressed as a Native American) and informs them she’s going to Chad’s for Thanksgiving.  In their room, Grace and Zayday talk about Thanksgiving break. Grace complains to her about her father’s lies and Zayday invites her to her house for Thanksgiving.  Meanwhile the Chanels are bubble wrapping Denise’s new wardrobe when Chanel #3 tells them about Boone’s “ghost.” Denise calls them over to the fireplace and begins to tell them ghost stories (most of which are set in bathrooms). With the exception of Neckbrace, they’re not comforted.

At the Dollar Scholar house, Chad is vacuum sealing all his clothes while packing when Boone arrives. Chad also believes him to be a ghost. Boone tells Chad he’s returned to take Zayday on a date — his plot somehow not fooling Chad who reminds him he’s “super gay.” After a ridiculous conversation, Boone convinces him. At the Kappa house, Denise goes to the bathroom to find one of her ghost stories come to life before she is attacked by the Red Devil, who she manages to escape. She informs the others and barricades them in Chanel’s closet. In order to calm Denise down, Neckbrace tells her own ghost story to a positive effect. They debate about leaving the room, but only Chanel #5 winds up leaving the closet.

Zayday is packing with Earl Grey. They begin making out before he stops the action to gather a plethora of romantic supplies to “make it perfect.” As he leaves, Boone crawls in her window and begins hitting on her. Zayday calls his ridiculous ghost story as Grace comes in; together, they realize he is one of the killers. There’s a struggle that ends with Boone falling out the window, but when Grace and Zayday look, there’s nobody outside. They get the others and tell them what they saw. Boone fatally attacks Earl Grey on his way back from the Kappa house, while Chanel #5 is driving away from campus. A truck honks at her (straight out of Neckbrace’s ghost story), so she pulls into a gas station to confront the driver. He informs her there was someone in the backseat of her car, then immediately is killed by the Red Devil. Horrified, #5 speeds away.

At the frat house, Neckbrace confronts Chad (now with neckbrace back on) about why she was not invited to Thanksgiving. He gives her multiple shallow reasons, but none of them are good enough and she offers him a not-too-vague threat. The Kappa house responds to the recent murders and realizes Boone may be the baby from the bathtub. Neckbrace returns and tells them another “ghost story” about how Chad got her pregnant. Chanel confronts Chad, who corroborates her story. He laments that he has to marry her now. Chanel snaps and tells him he is going to pay. She regroups with Chanels #3 and #5 and apologizes for her recent treatment of them. #5 is not so ready to forgive, but ultimately relents. They begin to plan a way to get rid of Neckbrace.

Grace and Zayday meet with the police and Munsch to describe their attacker. The detectives call in a local paranormal society, believing the killer might not be human (sure, sure). Munsch is angered by the detective’s incompetency and dismisses him. She goes to see Zayday and Grace, and offers them more information about the night in the tub. She says, as we learned last week, the babies were fraternal twins and believes Boone is the boy. Somewhere else, Boone is talking to the other Red Devil (identity still hidden), waiting for Gigi. She arrives and scolds him for jeopardizing the plan and disobeying her. Boone comes back at her, claiming he worked hard on her orders and took a night for himself. However, just as it appears Boone and the other killer are about to kill Gigi, the unidentified Red Devil kills Boone instead. Gigi congratulates the Red Devil for her commitment to revenge.

At the Kappa house, Neckbrace is going through Chanel’s clothes after her apparent leave. They offer her sushi, unpasteurized cheese, and tobacco-infused alcohol, all of which she accepts. They claim she’s faking her pregnancy, and she admits to lying but says it no longer matters because Chad still believes her. She exits, and Chanel runs after her. She tells Neckbrace she regrets that she had to go through life as an outcast before throwing Neckbrace down the stairs and breaking her neck. Chanel claims her revenge will become a new cautionary urban legend.

Body count: 4

WTF moments:

• Chad’s haunted house... okay that was funny.
• “When I feel like ISIS don broke in my house," classic Denise Hemphill. 
• All of Denise’s stories were overly ridiculous but gold because it was her.
• Boone’s weird motive.
• The stupid paranormal society scene.

Killer suspects:

• Neckbrace: We know the other killer is female and she certainly has motive.
• Chanel: Again, female killer and Chanel didn't deny it when she was accused of possibly being the killer.

Sorry about the delay, but check in this week for more updates and try not to eat too much turkey!

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Castle 8x08 "Mr. & Mrs. Castle" (Unite and Conquer) [Contributor: Hope]

"Mr. & Mrs. Castle"

Original Airdate: November 23, 2015

This week Castle did something wonderful. It’s not just that this was by far the best episode of the season –– with the great balance of comedy and suspense, it really was. No, it also put an end to that terribly annoying, cringe-worthy storyline that felt like it would never end! It. is. OVER. Does it make up for the last several episodes? Maybe not. But it sure did make waiting it out worth it.

There wasn’t a B-storyline in this episode, as Ryan and Esposito took the backseat, and Lanie was nonexistent (Perlmutter, it’s been forever). So this review is going to be organized a little differently this time around. Let’s start at...

THE BEGINNING

The episode started with Martha and her signature common sense. That’s a little silly to say about a character who once spent the entirety of an episode repeating her play’s opening line, "Is he dead?" But Martha really has become the one who dishes out the common sense as of late. Then Hayley took over, and now it’s real –– she is Castle’s consultant. This makes her role sound much more permanent, and I’m glad. Toks Olagundoye is wonderful in this role, from Hayley taking over Castle’s office and dismissing him with a wave of her hand, to her raising her hands up and asking Castle if he was second-guessing his decision to hack Beckett’s operation. She’s brought to Hayley such a complex mix of characteristics: she’s tough, she’s kind, and she’s far from detached.

One good thing I have to say about the breakup storyline is that the show didn’t try to make Hayley a love interest. I remember that being speculated near the start of the season among fans, and it would have been such a trope-y mess. Hayley is a well-rounded character who already had a ton of depth in her first episode. It would have been a shame to waste her character that way.

THE BOAT

Castle and Beckett got stuck on a cruise liner and were shipped (he, he) off to sea along with their crime scene. The cruise employees were oddly told to not aid in the investigation. I get that the big wigs didn’t want a PR debacle, but they just didn’t get the concept that police trump cruise ship managers in priority. The police are basically the best move in a metaphorical game of rock, paper, scissors.

Anyway, Mr. Cranky Pants informed Castle and Beckett they had 60 minutes before a smaller boat would come and remove them from the cruise liner. The time constraint was a nice twist (and I actually thought it would span the whole episode), and it led to Castle and Beckett –– on multiple occasions –– declaring "divide and conquer!" which seemed like a bit of a bad omen. The funny thing is, the whole time they were actually working together, without problems, and it was wonderful. Their interactions were so relaxed and easy. THIS was the Castle I missed.

The cinematography of this episode shone in the sequence where Beckett chases their suspect through the boat’s boiler room. The guy threw something at her (rude) and the chase began. The camera darted around as Beckett climbed up and down stairs, and around the boat’s inner-workings. They cut quickly from shot to shot, and combined with the confusing nature of the setting, it created a wonderful sense of suspense. The whole time I watched this scene, the only thing I could think of was how HARD it must have been to shoot. This scene was the stuff of climaxes, not the first half of an episode.

I actually found the case itself really interesting. The victim had been undercover on a sort of one-man environmental sting, and although only the first half of the episode focused on it –– it then turned into a Vulcan Simmons related case –– I was engaged. It also brought us the Castle Pretends He Knows How to Dance Scene, which was comedic gold.

    

BRINGING CAT VIDEOS TO A HACKING FIGHT

The scene where Hayley hacked Vikram’s system was THE BEST. (Speaking of Vikram, he’s hilarious and his has a good dynamic with Beckett. However, he sent that text to Beckett in last week’s episode just to get her away from Castle. He loses points for that.) This scene, honestly, goes down as one of my favorites of the whole season. "Can you stop him?" "No," Hayley answers, "but I can slow him down," as she initiates COUNTERSTRIKE. "Slowing him down" = CAT VIDEOS. A boatload of them, meowing all over Vikram’s screens. The incredulous look on Beckett’s face was priceless.

The combination of the dynamics between Castle and Hayley, Beckett and Vikram, and of course, Castle and Beckett, came into full play here, and it was really nice to watch. It was the culmination of the first part of the season, and watching it, you get the sense that something good came from all the drama. I hope that going forward, these dynamics continue, because it was truly one of the best things that came from the past seven episodes. When Vikram "nuked" Castle’s system, Hayley was devastated by it. The sheer level of investment she had in this operation was a wonderful example of how much a part of the show she is –– and could be –– becoming.

THE CONFLICT

Then, of course, Castle had to find Beckett and get her to talk, because a full-on hacking war and the frying of his computers signaled a line had been firmly crossed. Cue the sad music! Their conversation in the precinct BAFFLED me. "Instead I find out you’ve been lying to me." Excuse me? When the case in the season premier involved Bracken and Beckett left soon after, Castle remarked on her need to be obsessed over a case. So the fact that he believed she needed "looking for me time" just blows my mind. Was I incorrectly assuming that he knew more about why she left than he actually did? He knew she was caught up in something bad, right? Even if it wasn’t the Lockset case? Someone, enlighten me.

Then Castle dropped a major truth bomb (to Beckett or the writers, you choose):

"You could have come to me, with everything. Broken us up, just like you did, only it would’ve been a cover and together, in secret, we could’ve taken this guy down."

*MIC DROP*

Yes, why didn’t this happen? This would have been rational. The only excuse I can come up with is that people, in real life, aren’t always rational. Beckett made a mistake because she was scared. I get that; it’s human. So I accept this mistake, but truly... this same conclusion could have been reached EPISODES ago, and now I feel a little exhausted.

He left, despite her asking him to wait, saying, "You have a job to do. And there’s no one better." It seemed like he had accepted and washed his hands of the whole mess. I wouldn’t say that he gave up, but he gave in. He’d been chasing after her and trying to be there for her for weeks. There comes a point in time where you just have to stop trying for your own sake. This was Castle’s time.

"OKAY"

While Beckett chased after a suspect with mixed success, Castle was at home, chatting with Lucy. That is, until Beckett came in. She admitted that he was right –– their breakup could be a cover. He argued that she had "lost faith" in him, which was a very valid point. He hadn’t lost faith in her, except in the very beginning of their breakup, before Alexis had convinced him not to.

Trust and faith are so closely entwined, and I think that was the root of the problem. There’s an immense level of trust between these two. Beckett let her walls down for him, he trusts her with his heart and with his safety when he inevitably gets in over his head. I could go on. Beckett argued back, "I didn’t realize how much I needed you until this happened," which, okay, I can see that. They work best as a team, so that makes sense. It also makes sense that she would realize how much it would hurt if she lost him, either through pushing him away or if Lockset went terribly wrong. However, they can’t downplay everything that has happened before this season. She knew she needed him well before this point, and I just don’t want them trying to invalidate that. A show cannot alter or undermine its emotional arcs for the sake of validating a new arc.

Anyway. There’s a long silence where Castle thinks this all over. It’s perfectly long and his answer is perfectly simple: "Okay."

This was such a great end to the otherwise annoying storyline. I’m still not sure that we needed to go through all that to get to this point, but maybe we’ll see things more clearly in the second part of the season. Either way, Castle and Beckett being fake broken up should be a lot more fun. I’ve had my reservations, but this episode was just what the season needed. Let’s hope more like this will follow when the show returns in January. Until 2016, everyone!

Notepad

• "Ooh, I am so glad you agreed to consult with Richard. Maybe now this money pit will turn a profit!" He, he.
• Hayley/Alexis fist-bump! #LadiesSupportingLadies.
• Is there really such a thing as cruise ship "resident guests"? People just live on these boats for years?!
• That dance scene, really and truly, was SO hilarious. The moment Castle recognized that "Jazz hands!" was something he could actually do, he lit up.
• "He’s just a little weird." "Well, normally he’s a lot weird... In a charming kind of way." "Oh." There was so much depth to that "oh."
• That hacking sequence screen with the circling numbers and action-filmy music was SO CHEESY.
• "No, we’ve got only two of the blinky boxes left to go!" "Blinky boxes." "Just hack!" Castle’s terminology is basically mine.
• "I’ve got a cyber nuke." This is scary. But… did he really need the SUPER HELPFUL ROCKET PICTURE? I mean... it doesn’t look very serious.
• "Ah, you are having a pity party. That’s okay, I’ll leave. But I will be taking a pretty juicy clue with me." Vikram is so excited about this secret investigation stuff. Please don’t kill him off, show.
• Lucy: "Don’t take this the wrong way, Rick, but you don’t make any sense." Castle: "Well, it’s because I’m in love. But you... wouldn’t understand that." "So why are you talking to me about it?" "Touché."
• Question: does this episode and resolution make up or partially make up for the drama of this season so far? If this episode was the series asking for forgiveness for this storyline, would you answer, "okay"?
• The Annoyingness of the Caskett Breakup Scale: 4!

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The Vampire Diaries 7x07 "Mommie Dearest" (Eyes Wide Open) [Contributor: Megan Mann]

"Mommie Dearest"

Original Airdate: November 19, 2015

Things have been getting hectic in Mystic Falls and at Whitmore, guys. And now, with Julian being back and Alaric discovering that his babies were trapped and now safe in Caroline, things are about to get even more twisted.

Three years from now, Damon and Alaric are racing towards the studio where Caroline has just given her little speech. They know that they’re heading into a trap, but it’s better them than Stefan. Caroline is merely the bait and when Damon walks into the studio, he sees that it’s empty; it’s just a video of her speaking. This is a problem. Before he can take action, his back is shot with vervaine darts and he crumbles to the ground.

In the present, Caroline is taking a pregnancy test to see if the mystical coven spell actually took and if she’s now carrying the twins and future of the Gemini coven. As Alaric points out, it makes sense for Caroline to have been the safe place. Her body can’t exactly die and they needed their line to continue. It’s a logical move when they knew they had to act fast.

While Damon is chiefly concerned (and rightly so) with taking out Julian, Stefan informs him that they’ll be hosting Thanksgiving. This seems a little off to me since Stefan said he couldn’t eat real food in season one, but okay. Julian knows that the brothers want him dead and they need to be strategic rather than impulsive. What they need is an ally. Of course, he means their mother.

Matt calls Caroline and informs her of what they found at the high school. He can’t get ahold of Bonnie and gets even more worried when he discovers she’s with Enzo. (Is this how they end up together in the future? Bonnie and Enzo is still so weird to me.) Despite taking them out, he said all of the people were back again that morning like they had never left. When he opens the door to the Grille, he finds all the tables are now occupied... by the people from the school.

The brothers try to appeal to Lily and gain her help. Hoping to make her see how cruel Julian is, Stefan tells her how he had gotten Valerie pregnant and the role Julian played in it. Emotions flit across her face as she’s surprised, stunned, and confused. It’s not surprising that Lily doesn’t buy it, as she’s so swayed by Julian. But Damon can see what Stefan is doing. Again, they have to be strategic. That’s why Lily is now on the floor after drinking concentrated vervaine. Classic Salvatore trickery.

Bonnie and Enzo are at the impound lot looking for Oscar’s car before Julian does. Enzo’s motivations are solely to win over Lily. Under the spare tire lies a sword. Among all of the bottles and various trash, that’s the only thing Julian is likely interested in. Bonnie recognizes it from her research of the Phoenix stone. The question is whether he’s worried about killing with it or being killed by it.

Lily is just coming to as her sons explain that not only is Julian brainwashing her again, but that she has a pattern of falling in love with the wrong men. She just can’t see it. We’re transported back to Thanksgiving in the 1800s. For the first time in the series, we get a real look at the man Papa Salvatore was. He was harsh and intense, manipulative of his wife. It’s the manipulation that they point out in the present. She’s impressionable and susceptible to abuse. Whether she likes it or not, she’s going to help them kill her paramour.

Over at the Grille, Matt shows Caroline the group of compelled people. Their IVs are filled with saline to keep them hydrated for long periods of time and there’s not a single bite mark on any of them. Suspicious, seeing as they believe this to be the work of the heretics. Matt wonders if they’re fattening the cattle for slaughter. This causes Caroline to totally toss her cookies into the trashcan. Instead of being honest, she doesn’t tell Matt what’s going on. Quickly diverting the conversation back to the well-fed zombies, she wonders if the compulsion can’t be siphoned away.

But Valerie knows that it’s senseless to do so. If she were to siphon off the compulsion from this particular group, they’ll simply just be replaced by another. She wonders if this is a safe place for Caroline to be, seeing as she’s a pregnant vampire. Despite the signs and putting more faith in the pregnancy test, Caroline denies it and promptly freaks out on her. She quickly apologizes and pleads for her help. Well, it’s worth a try, I guess.

Enzo and Julian act like two schoolboys ready to scrap on the playground for the affections of the same girl. Julian respects Lily’s request of no more bloodshed in her house, so they obviously take it to the woods to duel. Yes, a duel. Swords and all.

The vervaine bonds sear into Lily’s skin as we’re taken back to that Thanksgiving past. Their father asks Lily to fetch him a bourbon, taking her out of the room. He accuses the boys of taking money from him as he lights a cigar. Smoke clouds around him as he sternly tells them to do what’s right. Damon decides to take one for the team and lies saying that he took it. He raised neither liars nor thieves, and quickly grabs Damon’s arm, burning it with the cigar.

Lily knew that Giuseppe was a monster. She knew what he had done to Damon that night. Before she can explain herself, a cut appears on her neck. Someone is trying to kill Julian. They ask her how she could know that. To protect him from her sons, they did a spell binding Lily and Julian’s lives; if he dies, so doe she. Talk about a wrench in the plan.

Breaking from the compulsion, Caroline turns around and compels the group again to forget what happened. She catches herself in a mirror and wonders if what Valerie said might be true. Matt asks if she wants to talk about It, but she maintains there is nothing to discuss. Beau comes into the Grille and sees what they have done. He does a spell that causes Valerie and Caroline to fall and before he can hurt them more, Valerie stabs him and places and invisibility spell over them.

Enzo stalks slowly through the forest spotting blood on a rock. Julian had disappeared but he was close. He sneaks up behind Enzo as his sword drops.

Lily cleans up the blood from their mutual cut and admits to Stefan that she had taken the money from their father. Stefan doesn’t understand how she could let Damon take the blame over herself and then stay with the man for years afterward. All Lily wanted to do was get them away from Giuseppe, but he was always one step ahead of her. He had found the train tickets she intended to escape with. She knew that he was a monster. She knew that with eyes wide open. With his threat to take them away from her, she stayed. Everything was to protect them.

The fight continues in the woods, but is stunted when Damon knocks Julian out. Or at least he thinks he does. Julian comes up from behind, but Damon is quicker and stabs him in the heart. Lily falls to her knees as blood drips from her mouth. The sword is turned as Julian shutters.

Bonnie walks into Alaric’s office to find him drunk and alone in the dark. She opts to stay in his office to find out more information on the sword. Quickly she finds what she needs. The Phoenix stone gives the sword its power against immortal foes. Something about this doesn’t sit well within the office.

Damon informs Enzo that Julian is using Lily as a human shield, oblivious to the fact that there are people hellbent on seeing her dead. They both think Lily is dead but then... plot twist! Julian comes up and snaps Enzo’s neck, confusing Damon. Clearly, this is where the “Oh, no” Bonnie uttered regarding the sword is going to start making sense.

The girls make their escape from Beau, and Caroline asks her to stop with the evasion. Valerie seems to know plenty about the spell that the coven placed on Caroline to keep the twins safe, and she wants the truth as to why. As Valerie talks, Caroline puts the pieces together and finally finds out the secret Stefan has been hiding. Their story might have ended badly, but Caroline can help see that Alaric’s story doesn’t.

Stefan and Lily intervene in the fight between Damon and Julian, asking what’s going on. Damon has once again acted impulsively and tried to kill Julian so he can kill two vampires with one sword. Julian makes a sly comment about that not being able to kill him seems to be lost on the brothers at this time, but it’s certainly an important note.

Matt tells Bonnie that Jeremy and Tyler (throwback!) think they know of a way to deal with the compulsion problem and that he’s going to look into it while Stefan and Damon disagree over how the day was handled. It doesn’t matter what the real story is, Damon will never get over how Lily faked her death, ditched them and has spent the past century trying to forget them. It’s a testament to their acting ability that they can be both angry and hurt in such a beautiful way in this scene. Stefan doesn’t even try to stop him from leaving.

Questions of what Julian was doing in the woods with Enzo and why he would engage in a duel knowing his life was bound to hers flood out of Lily. But the most important question she asks is if he knew that Valerie was pregnant with Stefan’s child. There’s a moment of hesitation before Julian plays dumb and it’s obvious that he’s lying. Now it begs another question: Does Lily believe him? She willingly forgives him, but could she just be doing it for appearance's sake?

The moment takes her back in time to Giuseppe apologizing for the way he handled the train tickets. The exchanges are almost identical and it seems as if she’s finally seeing what her sons have been trying to tell her.

An ultrasound reveals that there is neither one nor two babies inside Caroline. Alaric apologizes for believing that this was possible and for putting her through that. Valerie comes in and they inform her that she was wrong. Again. “Are you sure about that?” she asks and siphons something from Caroline’s stomach. It didn’t make sense that the spell pointed toward Caroline and the tests came up negative and then it clicked when she used the cloaking spell against Beau. The coven would have done anything to protect the twins from harm, so they too were cloaked. When she removes the spell, the three of them see the twins on the ultrasound machine. Not only is there finally a shred of light in the darkness of their lives, but this is a great way to cover up actress Candace Accola’s pregnancy.

The doorbell rings. Lily walks in and realizes that they were right; she had traded one monster for another. Stefan’s plan worked! Lily has a plan and, having been in his pocket for so long, knows that they won’t get caught this time. But knowing the track record of this group, something will happen. It’s just a matter of when.

What is the significance of the sword? What is it that Jeremy and Tyler suggested to Matt? What is Julian actually doing with the group of people plugged into the IVs? And most importantly, what exactly is Lily planning to do when her life is bound to his? Ugh. Until next time, my fine friends!

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Series: This Week's TV MVPs - Week 22

Welcome back to yet another week in our now-famous TV MVP Series! We've switched things up a bit this week, as rules have changed slightly for the series. In order to ensure that we are distributing our love for television as equally as possible, you'll now only see one actor per show (per article)! I love that everyone on this staff is so passionate about their television shows and I hope that you all love them for the same reason. (And for other reasons too, of course.) As Thanksgiving approaches this week, I couldn't be more grateful to be surrounded by a community of writers who genuinely make me laugh and cry and sometimes laugh so hard that I cry. They're much more than writers to me, though. They are friends. And I'm thankful that they're here.

Speaking of Thanksgiving, we will be taking a break from the TV MVP Series next week, November 29th! Instead, we will be spending time with our families and... let's be real here, we'll actually all probably be watching television in some capacity. We hope you enjoy your holiday and we will resume the series the following week on December 6th — DECEMBER, YOU GUYS.

But for now, let's continue with another week in discussing some of the best performances on television. This week, my cohorts are:

• The lovely and witty Megan
• The absolutely delightful Lizzie
• The precious and talented Lynnie
• The sassy (and stellar) Chelsea
• The calm in our chaos, Jon

Let's get to it then!

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