You're the Worst 2x04 "All About That Paper" (Lay Off Me, Would You?) [Contributor: Anne]

"All About That Paper"

Original Airdate: September 30, 2015

I said in my recap of last episode's You're the Worst that I was nervous. Now do you see what I mean?

I have no idea where Gretchen went, though I think we're meant to suspect that it's Ty that she's returning to; not only because we have no idea where else she would go but because Stephen Schneider is hilarious in the role and he would be fun to see again. Also, I have to assume Gretchen's not going anywhere noble. She's using the phone specifically designed for "garbage people" and is leaving Jimmy in the lurch (and, in effect, the audience as well).

So why did Gretchen do it? I think that You're the Worst did the best job possible in setting the stage for something that they really didn't set the stage for at all. For example, we didn't hear Gretchen ever voice her hesitation, nor do we see long, lingering looks at the ends of scenes to point to us her train of thought.

Instead we are left with two things. One, on our end, is the fact that this episode deliberately toys with our suspension of disbelief. Did anyone else feel that things were too good, too saccharine, between Jimmy and Gretchen? That there was something a little too tender about the plot that they were sharing –– specifically, that Jimmy and Gretchen promised they wouldn't check in with each other but checked in with each other anyway, and at the end of the day Jimmy says, "Aren't you happy we didn't check in with each other?" It seems almost impossible that these two characters, who have been kicking and screaming their entire courtship against falling in love and other permanent adult fixtures, would be so okay with this. The scene before the one where Gretchen leaves ends in a fade-to-black –– something you see on a laugh-track, cutesy sitcom, not You're the Worst.

The only outward moment that pointed towards Gretchen's leaving was one expression that occurred so quickly that it only really came into itself in retrospect –– when Jimmy takes Gretchen's six-month check without pause and cashes it in. She's made a six-month commitment; he's accepted it within seconds, without any fuss.

So, in a sense, this episode is "All About That Paper." This moment is the turning point that verifies our own discomfort with Jimmy and Gretchen's domesticity; it's the moment when Gretchen understands totally what trap she has fallen into and what she is hard-wired to run away from.

But it's not just about the paper, obviously. It's about the recurring pattern that we've seen in the first couple of episodes where Gretchen and Jimmy are fighting against their own permanence. Jimmy had his moment two episodes ago, when he watched Gretchen move into his apartment with ease. He didn't run, though. But Jimmy's biggest flaw isn't that he's scared –– at least, not like Gretchen. Jimmy is more the hopeless romantic than Gretchen is. Jimmy is the one who tried to propose to Becca; Gretchen is the one who broke up with him whenever she believed he wanted to propose to her.

Remember the first episode? Jimmy said that he "didn't believe in" love; Gretchen said she was scared of it. In a story like Jimmy's, love surprises and ultimately redeems. Jimmy doesn't believe in love because he has never before experienced someone accepting him entirely for who he is; his belief is that love makes you into a "boring normal," when in reality love is finding someone who you don't always have to be presenting to –– which is boring but, said another way, undramatic. Comfortable.

In a story like Gretchen's, love terrifies.

The worst part is that Gretchen's fear directly challenges Jimmy's cynicism. If she runs away from him, it is a self-fulfilling prophecy for him that not even someone like Gretchen can leave his heart unbroken, and an encouragement that he should continue to isolate from others. 

"All About That Paper" also comes up for Jimmy in the form of the money he gets from the writer who asks to spend a day with him. He takes the guy's money but doesn't buy into what the guy is selling him –– the big writer-y gestures and projects or the book the guy has written. This is similar, I think, to Cory and Gretchen in the last episode –– that one character is introduced to intentionally remind us how much our main characters have changed from their worst selves –– and the conclusion of this episode (and Jimmy's confidence in his writing) is more about showing that for Jimmy, writing is never a chore or an activity he engages in because of his pretentiousness –– it's something pure and raw. So Jimmy, who has always felt socially shunned, has found an outlet in writing. Jimmy needs money, and is "all about that paper," but isn't willing to give up the reasons why he started writing in the first place to make it.

Paper comes up for Lindsay, too –– in the form of the divorce papers sent to her by Paul. This, also, is about more than just the piece of paper; it's about more than the stated "irreconcilable differences." It's about why they got married in the first place, why Lindsay started to become unfaithful, why Paul decided to become unfaithful, and the romantic moments they have shared since they separated. Paul isn't breaking up with Lindsay just because of irreconcilable differences; it's because he is trying to get rid of the part of him that is still holding onto her.

I have to confess that I didn't like this episode of You're the Worst that much. While it was funny and followed the same tight structure that previous episodes have, I felt that the four plots going on (Jimmy and the writer; Gretchen and the "rap beef"; Lindsay and the insemination attempt; Edgar and the improv) were all too broad and silly.

But maybe that's all in service of the final scene, which was shocking and devastating –– made better by Aya Cash's silent performance and the accompanying music which hammered in the themes You're the Worst has been showing us all along: "Lay off me, would you? / I'm just trying to take this new skin for a spin."

Stray Observations:

• PAUL IS STILL THE WORST. Sure, he told Amy about sleeping with Lindsay, but I bet he didn't tell her about watching Lindsay in the last episode!
• With that being said, if the insemination attempt is successful, I will be a lot less impressed with this show. She froze the hours-old sperm, microwaved it, put it in her wine cup and then used a turkey baster –– there's too much implausibility for this to seriously work. I would so, so much rather Paul/Edgar find out about the attempt than for Lindsay to become pregnant and then get an abobo. But with all this baby talk lately I can see that being the direction the show goes in. I don't really like babies on TV, but I would feel so icky if Lindsay revenge-impregnated herself and then got a guilty abortion.
• (I would also just hate Lindsay, then, which would be a shame because she was redeeming herself for me!)
• I still, forever, and ever, love Gretchen's rap crew. The beef was over-the-top, but I always love their brand of over-the-top.

Read More

Heroes Reborn 1x03 "Under the Mask" (All Over the Place) [Contributor: Meredith]

"Under the Mask"

Original Airdate: October 1, 2015

I need to start this week’s review with a disclaimer: I was so underwhelmed by the two-hour premiere last week, that I approached the eight o’clock hour of Thursday night with a general sense of ugh. I was not excited, but I had committed to watching and reviewing this show, and I was determined to see it through. At the very least, I thought to myself, I could snark my way through this.

That said, while the first 45 minutes or so of this episode were just as, if not more, underwhelming as the premiere, the last 15 minutes really saved it for me. The pace picked up, threads started to come together, and I found myself perking up, paying closer attention, and wondering what was going to happen next.

The show's biggest weakness continues to be the fragmentation and the way it jumps back and forth between too many stories. Each story by itself is confusing, but when the viewer is being asked to hold onto what is going on in so many places at once, it makes the entire show hard to follow and lessens the enjoyment. With a few notable exceptions *coughZacharyLevicough,* the acting on this show leaves something to be desired, and the heavy-handed and over-the-top writing does not aid the actors. The show is trying too hard and it isn't even clear on what it is trying to be or wants to be. As for what happened this week, I’m still not sure what everyone’s name is. But I’ll do my best to boil it down to the main points.

The episode opens in the Arctic Circle? Antarctica? The North Pole? I don’t really know -- somewhere snowy and cold. There’s still a blonde (Malina? Maybe?) who is trying to control the weather... I think, with the help of a ghost, who keeps telling her to hurry. So. That’s a thing that’s happening. Later in the episode, though, the bad guys seem to have located Malina, and we end with them converging on her location.

In Japan, Katana, whose real name is Miko apparently, goes to an office building and sword fights a bunch of bad guys who kindly take turns attacking her. But then she gets captured and questioned by the head bad guy who actually turns out to be the head bad woman’s right hand man. Miko’s friend saves her by distracting the bad guy so Miko can chop off his hand. Miko and her friend escape, and bad guy’s hand grows back. And then his chopped off hand turns into another person. A clone, of him. Yes.

Carlos’ nephew is disappointed about something, which spurns Carlos into putting on his brother’s vigilante mask. He uncovers a crew of dirty cops (led by HOT PAUL FROM ORPHAN BLACK!) who are hunting Evos. He helps the Evos escape, but gets into a fight with Hot Paul (who is not Hot Paul here but will always be Hot Paul to me). Turns out Hot Paul is a self-hating Evo, maybe? Because he has powers of super strength. Carlos narrowly escapes their fight, and has been beaten badly.

Tommy’s mom doesn’t want him to go to a party. He goes anyways. His guardian Fat Hat Guy follows, and so does Mom. Mom tells Fat Hat guy to leave them alone. Then Mom and Tommy start driving away, and Mom is skittish. Rightfully so, because they end up getting slammed into by another car.

Meanwhile, Zac is questioning his mission to kill Evos, but his wife is not. She is still super gung ho and, like, ridiculously happy about this plan. They agree to head west, but Zac soon discovers that somewhere along the way, he developed powers! He can harness the sun’s energy through his body. This development is very troubling for him.

Finally, Noah Bennet is at a hospital, where he apparently held a guard hostage the previous year, but he doesn’t remember. Some stuff happens that is super confusing, but leads Noah and his sidekick to go help Molly escape the bad guy clutches. However, Molly doesn’t want to be saved by Noah. She tries to escape on her own, but gets captured.

Everything that has happened is super confusing up until this point. But as the episode draws to a close, we see the bad guys (led by the bad woman, who is the mother of Molly’s manipulative captor from last week) hook Molly up to a device. Then, the bad woman gives a presentation to an audience full of people, where she demonstrates her new E.P.I.C. glasses, which can identify and locate any Evo, worldwide, by using Molly’s power (she doesn’t tell the audience that part.) This also seems to be how the bad guys found Malina in the Arctic. And apparently we don’t want them to find Malina.

Once again, the episode is confusing and all over the place. BUT, the disjointedness is starting to subside a little as storylines come together, and the ending left me at least a little curious about what’s happening next.

It looks like Heroes Reborn is starting to find its footing. I’m cautiously optimistic. However, they definitely need more Zachary Levi next week. He’s the strongest part of this show, and there wasn’t enough of him in this episode. This episode was a slight improvement over the premiere. The last few minutes definitely saved it, and hopefully they can hang onto that momentum and continue to pick up steam next week.

WTF Lines/Moments (Now including Cool Lines/Moments):

• HIRO! Hiro Nakamura, one of the main characters and breakout stars of the original series, was referenced more than once this week. And THEN... he was in the previews for next week! Color me excited.
• I can not tell you how happy I was to see Dylan Bruce (a.k.a. Hot Paul) on my screen. I’m a huge fan! And the fact that he’s a bad guy is even better. He’s super hot when he’s bad.
• I thought we as a society had moved past fight scenes where all the bad guys take turns waiting nicely to attack the good guy. I was mistaken.
• Why did the guard Noah took hostage help him so nicely, when he knew Noah was wanted for, like, killing a guard?
• Tommy uses his powers to “sneak out” against his mother’s wishes. But instead of teleporting straight to the party, he just teleports to outside his bedroom, in the hall, where his mother can see him. The kid has some learning to do.

What are you thinking about Heroes Reborn thus far? Let us know in the comments below!

Read More

Sleepy Hollow 3x01 "I, Witness" (Back in the Demon-Fighting Business) [Contributor: Deborah MacArthur]

"I, Witness"

Original Airdate: October 1, 2015

In my opinion, Sleepy Hollow's second season had two major flaws: 1) Failure to fully highlight the show's greatest asset, which is incontrovertibly the friendship between Abbie and Ichabod and 2) not making the decision to turn Katrina evil earlier than the penultimate episode so that the momentum of the season could be better focused. These problems stacked on top of lesser – but still significant – issues, like the redundancy of Nick Hawley (whose role as an expert in legendary artifacts could’ve been filled by Jenny) and the poor utilization of Frank Irving, another interesting character we didn't get to see a whole lot. That latter point is doubly frustrating since we all know Orlando Jones isn't going to be around for season three. I mean, they could have given him a big send-off last season and I would have been fine with losing the character for this season but, no. I suppose, at the very least, season two gave Irving a pretty awesome sword fight scene.

What’s in store for season three after that rocky second season, though? There’s been a lot of buzz about getting the show back to its first season vibe, but will they be successful?

Before we get into the premiere, here’s a reminder of what you need to know: Last season, Katrina went a bit evil and then a bit more evil after Henry (a.k.a. Jeremy Crane) was shot and then died. She tried using a time travel spell to kill Ichabod back in 1781, but thanks to Abbie and great-great-great grandma Grace Dixon, she failed. Katrina was unhappy about said failure, tried strangling Abbie to death, fought with Ichabod and got killed in the process. Ichabod was pretty sad because his wife just tried to kill his best friend and also turned evil and died. Big picture, though: Moloch and all associated minions were destroyed! Apocalypse averted!

OR WAS IT?

Of course not, what do you think season three is going to be about? Ichabod picking out china patterns for his new condo?

We open up on the Headless Horseman in a really well-done sequence. Ol’ Headless –– the baddie of yester-season –– runs into Pandora, who has a box (of course) and is the baddie of season three. She’s actually pretty interesting and creepy and seems to have a lot of power, because she just shoves the Headless Horseman into that box of hers and that’s the end of that. Want a good way to show the increase of power from one villain to the next, budding writers? Have the new villain shove the old one into a box. Works like a charm.

After we meet Pandora, we get to see Abbie again and she’s being cool and hitting fleeing criminals with trashcan lids and it’s great. Still, though –– we could hardly have one Witness without the other, so we’re moved quickly along to her reunion with Ichabod, who had been thrown into the Immigration and Customs Enforcement detention center four days prior for trying to “smuggle” artifacts from his ancestral home (crypts?) in Scotland. I really wish we’d gotten to see the hissyfit Ichabod doubtlessly threw once he’d been put into handcuffs. I bet he name-checked at least three of the Founding Fathers.

Anyway, it’s very clear that Ichabod and Abbie haven’t been speaking to each other during the nine months they’ve been separated and Abbie is not happy about it. Ichabod’s going through some stuff, obviously, after the deaths of his family members but Abbie’s problem is with the fact that he hasn’t included her in his mourning or soul-searching or whatever it was he’d been doing for almost a year. It’s totally understandable, since she’d told him about her past and her fears and all the painful stuff related to separating from Jenny, the backstory on her parents, and the loss of Sheriff Corbin. The least he could’ve done was let her in on whatever was going on in his head and not just disappear for nine months. Ichabod’s excuse is that he wanted to find himself and where he fit in the grand scheme of things.

“Fitting in” seems to be a theme for the characters in this episode. Ichabod’s struggling with finding his purpose in the world, which is what led him to Scotland and to the old tablet he found there –– and, from that, to the insistence that his and Abbie’s roles in the Apocalypse aren’t over. But Abbie has very much found her place in the world as the FBI agent she’d been on the way to becoming before Ichabod woke up from his centuries-long nap, and she’s certain that her former destiny is done and over with. Abbie missed Ichabod –– it’s clear that she missed him –– but she believes her role as a Witness ended with the deaths of Moloch and Henry and wants no part in his quest for more supernatural beasties in Sleepy Hollow. She humors Ichabod with his claims of future “tribulations” but doesn’t believe the monster of the episode –– the yaoguai –– is anything more than an old Moloch underling that missed the memo on the end of the End of Days.

Our heroes defeat the yaoguai –– well… Abbie defeats the yaoguai, because she’s awesome and comes in guns a-blazin’ when things go south for Ichabod and Jenny. Either way, the monster of the week is defeated and Abbie refuses to think this means that her role as a Witness is still happening. But then, the tablet Ichabod found in Scotland is released back into his possession and Abbie finds a hidden section on it with more prophetic carvings: two figures that resemble Abbie and Ichabod, captioned with the word "destroyers." Abbie is not completely on board the destiny train, but now she does acknowledge that her work with Ichabod isn't over.

The “fitting in” theme of the story applies to the episode –– and the show –– itself, as Sleepy Hollow is trying to find its footing again after the messiness of season two. “I, Witness” proves we’re off to a good start, with everything from the smooth introduction of the new villain to the classic Ichabod/Abbie banter working perfectly throughout. It had a lot going for it: the classic weirdness of Sleepy Hollow, putting Ichabod and Abbie’s partnership back at the forefront on the show, and terrifically twisting some American Revolution history in that way that only Sleepy Hollow can. Overall, the episode did a great job making me remember why I love this show so very much.

I don’t grade my reviews but, you know, this one gets an A.

Other Things:

• Ichabod’s “modern outfits” so far: 1) skinny jeans, 2) prison uniform. Yeah, Ichabod should stick to his old clothes.
• “Evil has returned to Sleepy Hollow.” Replace “evil” with “wonderfulness” and italicize Sleepy Hollow and you’ve got my assessment of this episode.
• This show’s opening credits are still some of the best around.
• Ichabod shifts his translation of the Bible from seven years of Tribulation to seven tribulations. This has the added bonus of not locking the show into seven seasons.
• How can the town demolish the Archives?! It’s got historical value! Do we need to get the folks in Sleepy Hollow to listen to the Hamilton musical and re-evaluate their priorities regarding American history?
• Jenny’s character development in this show is amazing and I love it.
• Irving’s in something like “witness protection.” Yeah. As in, protection from the Witnesses and the landslide of crazy they dumped into that poor man’s life.
• We didn’t see much of Betsy Ross but I’m sure we’ll see more. I’ll hold off on commenting until then.
• One thing, though: there were some women in the American Revolution who actually did disguise themselves as men, the most famous of which was probably Deborah Sampson (Hey there, fellow Deborah!) and I wish they’d picked one of them instead of shifting Betsy Ross into the role.
• “The corner goes at the front! You’re not a pirate!” Oh, Ichabod in that Colonial-themed restaurant was golden. The horror in his eyes.
• Abbie lost another mentor when her FBI boss got killed. Poor Abbie. :(
• I’m actually really looking forward to the Pandora storyline and character. Also, I realized that I recognize the actress from the movie A Knight’s Tale. That was bugging me.
• What exactly is the "resemblance" between Abbie/Ichabod and the Sumerian-Akkadian carvings? The height disparity?

What did you all think about Sleepy Hollow's return? Let us know in the comments below!

Read More

Con Man 1x01 ("Stalled"), 1x02 ("Cash Poor") & 1x03 ("Behind the Lens") Reviews [Contributor: Lynnie Purcell]

"Stalled," "Cash Poor," & "Behind the Lens"

Original Airdate: September 30, 2015

Con Man was written by Alan Tudyk for the fans about the fans. It is one of those cool experiments of putting the future of the show into fan’s hands –– and they more than stepped up to make Con Man a reality. Shows like this one are changing the future of broadcasting for the better, but that doesn’t necessarily mean that everything about the show is magical.

Entertainment Weekly released the first three episodes for an hour last night and I immediately jumped at the chance to check out a show helmed by one of my favorite actors. The fact that the credits read like an independent movie thrown together in a basement, where one guy starred, directed, wrote, scored, produced, and played all the background actors is amusing, but not nearly as funny as the opening scene.

The lack of privacy many actors face in the world of fandom has had no better symbolism than a man trying to poop and having fans actually demand that he sign something of theirs mid-dump. All privacy is gone –– Wray (Alan Tudyk) has become nothing more than a prop for the fans’ enjoyment. It’s funny, ridiculous, and Alan plays it with the dry humor, everyman quality, and a gentle sense of giving up that I love about him.

The rest of the episode was merely okay for me. Sean Astin is always treat, though, like Alan, he’s playing a heightened version of himself. They are both rude, self-absorbed, and inconsiderate. These qualities are not portrayed as particularly bad or good in the show. They simply is the way the characters are, much like the fans asking inappropriate things at inappropriate times. Actors can be ridiculous, and Alan is not afraid of making fun of himself as much as he makes fun of the fans. I like that he refrains from passing judgement, but the storyline of trying to convince a passenger to give up his seat falls flat in the first episode. The fan gives back as much as he gets, and the amount of stuff he wants Wray to sign is deeply accurate of cons, but if there was humor in the exchange, it went over my head.

The second episode has Alan arriving at the con, where he is immediately greeted by Bobbie (Mindy Sterling), who is equal parts awesome and insane. Her delivery saves the character from caricature status, and Tudyk has given her some of the best moments in the first three episodes. She’s a washed-up actress in charge of arranging cons for Wray. She dreams of starring on the big screen once more, though no one seems to care. Her type is definitely common to L.A. and cons, but she doesn’t feel pitiful, even though she is the butt of the joke nearly constantly.

The focus of the second episode is the fans. Real fans getting Wray’s signature showcase the wonderful weirdness of people who love science-fiction. The funniest moment of the episode was Darth Vader struggling to pick up a picture via his gloved hands. Tudyk allowed the moment to linger, and it was hilarious. Felicia Day playing sweet perfectly was another highlight of the episode. What makes this sweetness all the more funny and enjoyable is when she unleashes her crazy at the appropriate time, and thoughtfully treading the line between adorable and insanity.

Episode three has Wray doing a meet-and-greet, where it feels like Alan is saying some of things he’s always thought about saying to fans. While it is played for laughs, as he’s is exceedingly high during the scene, I didn’t find it as funny as I suppose it was meant to be.

As it stands, I am on the fence about the series. Some of the moments feel strained, while others are genuinely funny. I like that Wray isn’t necessarily a good guy, but rather a typical man who has been told he’s awesome for so long that hates it: a man who is having trouble finding good work after a short-lived stint on a cult classic. The show is part tribute to the fan, part mocking the people who make conventions so weird and wonderful. It’s a love story that for now, falls just short of the mark, though I’m eager to see if Tudyk picks up the ball later on. I am definitely interested to see where he takes the rest of Con Man and am leaving final judgment up in the air until I have the entire thing in front of me.

Stray Notes:

• Wil Wheaton’s beard guest stars as an Air Marshal.
• After traveling for so long, I feel that tiny bathroom straight to my soul.
• “I am broken.” – I feel like this may be relevant to, like, character growth and stuff.
• Sean Astin says the p-word as a casual insult. Awesome. (Not awesome.)
• They keep saying "retarded" in the technical sense of the word, but trying to make it funny via saying Wray is being retarded by the fans. They linger on it, playing it for laughs. It’s just… no.
• A boobage purse is always useful. Keep one on hand at all times.
• Felicia Day is a gift. Felicia Day is also poopy sick for most of her episodes. I love this to no end.
• Rico! I mean Casper Van Dien. He steals his scenes and he says nothing.
• Best quote: “It smells like wolf’s urine and brie.”

Read More

Empire 2x02 "Without a Country" (Working Hard or Hardly Working) [Contributor: Rae Nudson]

"Without a Country"

Original air date: Sept. 30, 2015

When you are young, scrappy, and hungry, there’s not much you won’t do to get on top. Starting a new company is not easy, and it’s infinitely harder when you have Lucious Lyon gunning for you. Cookie knows this, and she’s crafty enough and works hard enough to make it happen. But are Andre and Hakeem willing to do what it takes to make something out of nothing when they’ve had everything their whole life? Out of the four of them (if you count Anika, which Cookie does not), Cookie is the only one who really knows what it means to start out with nothing, sweeping your own empty floor and imagining something better. Lucious was right there with her the first time they started a company, and it's part of why he's still so scrappy and crafty, even when he's locked up.

However, no one is thirstier for success than Thirsty himself. Lucious' new lawyer proved himself invaluable when he not only got Lucious out on bond by bribing the judge, but also got Lucious to record a song from prison and get it on the radio. (No one was less surprised than Cookie, who knows what Lucious is capable of.) I can't wait to see what Andre Royo does with this character, who reminds me of another shady lawyer that I love: Saul Goodman.

And how great was that ad hoc recording studio? I don’t know how Thirsty and Lucious found a group of prisoners who know what to do with a soundboard and a beat, but Empire has never been that worried about logic. It very much seemed like an actual music video, with Lucious looking straight into the camera and everything. And Tiana’s dance moves were shot like a video as well. But honestly if the entire hour looked like one giant music video, I might be okay with that.

So far, Andre doesn’t want to be a part of starting anything new — he wants what he’s already put blood, sweat, and tears into: Empire. He knows this new enterprise isn't him. Rhonda knows it too, which is why she begs Jamal to take Andre back. She gets Andre on board, but Lucious is, as always, more difficult. Andre was right when he told Lucious that he can't have done anything worse in Lucious' eyes than be gay or sleep with his fiancé, so why is Andre the one son he won't allow back at his company? What Andre doesn't know and what we learn in a flashback is that Lucious' mother also may have showed signs of bipolar disorder (I'm not totally sure what that flashback meant, but to me it indicated Lucious' mom, played by Kelly Rowland, had some mental health issues of her own.) As always, Lucious only wants people on his side that he can manipulate and get something from. Just hold out a little longer Andre, until you have something your dear old dad wants to steal from you, and I'm sure he'll let you back in then.

I wouldn’t have suspected it, but Hakeem is showing that he might really have what it takes. Hakeem is demonstrating the good, driven part of Lucious, whereas Jamal is operating like the ruthless, evil part of Lucious. (But maybe those are two sides of the same coin.) Even though his brother and father did their best to make him think about his legacy, Hakeem is thinking bigger than both of them. Hakeem wants to be a music legend in more ways than one: through his rap and through producing new talent. His idea for an all-Hispanic girl group may have some traction at their new company.

Cookie names their new business Dynasty because she has the wisdom to know that you can aim high and grow into your name. While she and Jamal are growing into their future roles, Jamal is still growing into Lucious' mini-me. He still has some heart left in him — his reaction when he found out he was going to be an uncle was too sweet — but if he keeps shutting out his family to do Lucious' bidding, his soft heart will only grow harder.

Seeing Jamal act ruthlessly has been interesting, but he's at his best when he's trying to prove himself and when he has Cookie by his side instead of Lucious. Jamal and Cookie's scene together was great — in part because of the chemistry between Taraji and Jussie Smollett. Jamal's scenes with Cookie have way more chemistry than any of Jamal's scenes with Michael, which is maybe why I'm not super into that couple. But along with an hour-long Empire music video, I would definitely watch an hour of Cookie and Jamal trying to hide their arguments and play nice in a room full of reporters.

Empire’s look, much like Cookie’s, is sharper and shinier this season. It looks like the show got a way bigger budget or a way different frame of mind and is much more cinematic and precise. That opening was like nothing ever before on Empire and it was a hoot to watch the montage of the Lyon family on the phone with each other and learning who said what to who, who promised too much, and who was straight-up lying.

Cookie crumbs:

• I love Anika, but what is she still doing with these jokers? I know she wants a job in the music business and has burned bridges with the biggest players, but what in the world would compel a woman to stick around the family that screwed her in multiple ways?
• Also, I totally don’t blame Cookie for never wanting to see Anika again after Anika slept with her 20-year-old son. 
• Ludacris played a guard in the prison and Lucious’ new enemy, and I am here for it.
• The show that Jamal did an interview for is called “Spilling the Tea.”
• Hakeem better learn to read his contracts if he wants to run a business. Nothing good can come from him leaking his album online — and telling everyone he did it.
• Cookie’s best line: “I wanted to tell you first before you hear it out here in the streets. Me, Andre, and Hakeem, we’re starting our own company,” right as the elevator door is closing. Cookie sure does know how to enter and leave a room. 

Read More

Hope's Pick: Top 10 Episodes of "Rookie Blue" [Contributor: Hope]

There are two things I discovered while writing this post. Firstly, that I really need to re-watch Rookie Blue from the beginning through the season six finale. It’s been entirely too long since I have. And secondly, that it is very, very hard to narrow down seventy-four episodes to the top ten. That’s when I made some ruthless decisions… and just barely cut my list down to the necessary ten. These are some of the episodes I felt were pivotal, funny, or just simply well-done. They are the ones that stand out in my mind when I think of pure examples of Rookie Blue's greatness. However, there are still 64 other episodes out there that I loved to pieces.

So, join me in a – chronological – look down memory lane. If I almost caved in and renamed this post "Hope’s Top 15 Episodes" (one slippery slope away from "Hope’s Top 74 Episodes"), I certainly couldn’t bring myself to pick favorites out of my favorites. Therefore, numbers don’t equal any sort of ranking. And to keep from these turning into full-blown reviews, I’ll just highlight, in paragraph or so, why they made the cut.

WARNING: 

Spoilers ahead for the episodes discussed and possibly for others.

Read More

Series: First (And Third) #TBT- Week 3 Spotlight: Lizzie [Contributor: Maddie]

Maddie approached me about doing a Throwback Thursday (#tbt, for all you Internet-savvy folks) piece where we highlight, bi-monthly, our writers. She noted that what makes our site unique and separates it from all of the other entertainment sites out there is the personal touch each of the writers put on their reviews. Throughout this #tbt series, you'll get the chance to know each of us as individual writers a little bit more and hopefully relate to us a little bit more as well. Thanks, Maddie, for such a great idea!

It's officially October, people! Fall television is back, Target is being filled with pumpkin-flavored products, apparently in some places the weather is actually getting cooler (as a SoCal girl I wouldn't know what that feels like), and we have another installment of our #ThrowbackThursday series. This week I (Maddie) got to talk to the lovely Lizzie about her nostalgic faves. Enjoy!

CONTRIBUTING WRITER: LIZZIE

(31 years old)

Q: What was your first major TV obsession and how did it impact you and your taste in television?

A: The X-Files. I feel like all my answers are going to be The X-Files-related. I was nine when it premiered, and I guess at that age I wasn’t even supposed to be watching it, but my parents were always very open, and so I presented my argument and was allowed to watch it. And, oh, I made it an event. I turned off all the lights, and no one could like, come into my room or anything. Not even if I screamed (which happened often). In the years that have passed since then, I’ve been left with an enduring love for procedural shows and will-they or won’t-they relationships that this show is completely responsible for.

Q: What Disney movie do you still love to watch and sing the songs to?

A: This has to be a trick question, because  you can’t possibly expect me to pick JUST one. Sleeping Beauty was my first love, and then Aladdin was my second love, but then... look, Disney is like the one thing you don’t give up when you get older. So, I don’t even feel embarrassed to say that I sing both “Let it Go” AND “Do You Want to Build a Snowman?” like, three or four times a week. I just randomly burst into song like in a musical. That’s how much I love both songs. But, I have a Disney playlist on my iPod, and it’s one of those things that I listen to at least once a week.

Q: What pop culture obsession are you a little embarrassed of loving so much in retrospect?

A: Sailor Moon. I’m not usually embarrassed about things I love, but I recognize how silly it all was, in retrospect. Doesn’t mean I don’t love it.

Q: Here's a fun little game: what nostalgic music would you pick for one of your OTPs today? (For example, during seasons two and three of Once Upon a Time I regularly listened to "It's Gonna Be Me" by NSYNC because it gave me major Captain Swan feelings.)

A: “Thank You” by Dido gives me so many Olicity feels, and it’s the first song that came to my mind when you asked this question. Maybe because I’m still in Olicity angst mode, but yeah, I can imagine Oliver saying all of that.

Q: What movie or television show do you still quote on a regular basis?

A: So many. I’m one of those annoying people who remembers everything. I’m like an elephant. I remember the first lines (and last lines) from my favorite books. I memorize quotes. I remember what you were wearing that first time we met seventeen years ago. It’s absurd. So I can, and do quote Buffy the Vampire Slayer, The X-Files, House, Gilmore Girls, and oh, I quote The Godfather. All the time. You’d think I was Italian, I quote it so much. “Leave the gun, take the canoli” is like, my answer to everything.

There’s a reason the term “shipping” started with these two.

Q: Who was your television OTP before you even knew the term existed?

A: Mulder/Scully. I was there for that since like, episode three. On re-watch it’s kind of obvious that we waited like, six seasons too long for them to happen.

Q: What was your first Internet fandom and what brought you to it?

A: It was the The X-Files, but I wasn’t really involved then. I mainly just lurked and read fanfic. My first real, totally involved fandom was Harry Potter. I was still pretty young when I got involved, sixteen or so (years before the fifth book came out). I remember getting the first four books and reading them in like, three or four days and then just not knowing what to do. I needed more. I needed to talk to someone, I needed to read fanfic, I needed to analyze the books to death and to dissect them. And since there was NO ONE around me willing to have the in-depth conversations I wanted to have, I just went online stumbled onto a Harry/Ginny site, and then just never left.

Exhibit A of Lizzie’s love of Harry Potter

Q: First show/ship you read fanfiction for?

A: Again, The X-Files. I told you this was going to be the answer to everything. As I said before, Harry Potter was my first experience of being involved in fandom. But reading? Oh, yes. I read so much X-Files fanfic in my day that I was literally surprised when, just last week, someone linked me to a good story written back in the days that I had never read. It was disappointing. I was sure I’d read all there was.

Q: Who is your favorite F.R.I.E.N.D?

A: Monica. Maybe because, at times, I feel like a Monica minus the obsessive cleaning thing. I can be pretty OCD about things, and I hate losing and just love to have friends around all the time. Also, I would totally do the turkey thing. But then, I also love Chandler. I think I’m more Chandler in my sense of humor than Monica, but I relate to her more. So, yes, Monica. Or Phoebe. I love them all! Don’t make me choose!

Q: First TV boyfriend?

A: David Boreanaz as Angel. Didn’t even have to THINK about that one. Even though The X-Files came first, I was a little too young to look at Mulder that way. And then Angel just... wow. I was in love. I was willing to share him with Buffy, because an OTP is an OTP, but I was in love. So in love that, to this day, even though I’ve gone through, like, twenty other TV boyfriends, I still watch Bones. David Boreanaz is there. I can’t help it.

Q: What was the first show that inspired you to write about it?

A: The X-Files. If the creators had done the Mulder/Scully relationship justice, I might not be a writer today, because somewhere around season four or five, I just started thinking: "No, this is not the way this is supposed to go. They’re wrong. I have a better idea and I need to find a way to express it." So I started writing.

Q: What has been your favorite thing about being involved in fandoms?

A: The people I’ve met. I’ve been pretty involved in fandoms. I’ve met so many wonderful people that defy the label “Internet friendships”: people whose weddings I’ve attended, whose houses I’ve stayed in, whose kids call me aunt. And it’s funny because you think you can’t feel as close to someone who’s on the other side of the world as you feel to the people you talk to every day, but that’s a lie. You absolutely can. You can make real friends, best friends, and it’s amazing, surprising and humbling. I’m lucky and I know it.

Q: Favorite kiss from 90s to early 2000s in TV and film?

A: Either Josh and Cher’s first kiss from Clueless, or the kiss at the end of Never Been Kissed. Yeah, probably the latter one. Josh and Cher are cute, but they’ve got nothing on Drew Barrymore and Michael Vartan in the middle of the baseball field, after she put herself out there that way. I just... yeah, I just re-watched that scene and felt just as nervous as the first time.

Q: What TV friendship did you aspire to have growing up?

A: Is it weird to say Lorelai and Rory? I wanted that when I was growing up. I kind of still want that with the imaginary kid I one day plan to have. But then, later on, I wanted a friendship like Christina and Meredith’s on Grey’s Anatomy. I was already pretty grown up at the time, but they were (and still sort of are) my friendship goals. Because it was never about being alike or understanding each other, it was about being there. All the time. No matter what.

Q: Finally, what female fictional character from television past was the most influential on you? Why?

A: I think the answer is either Scully or Buffy, or a combination of both. Scully taught me that it was okay to go against expectations, that common sense was your most important weapon and that changing your mind wasn’t the same as giving in, but Buffy, Buffy taught me how to be strong. And I don’t even mean in the physical sense, I mean in the "taking care of everyone, having the weight of the world on your shoulders and still moving forward kind" of way. And though I haven’t had to fight any real monsters, the literal ones have been easier to defeat because of those lessons I learned from her.

Read More